Dissatisfied with his current love life, Brian decides to slow things down when he meets the girl of his dreams, Carolyn. However, Cleveland soon sweeps Carolyn off her feet, and Brian must do anything he can do, to win her back, even if it means involving Cleveland's ex-wife, Loretta.

When Peter re-discovers his love for the painfully annoying yet seductively catchy tune "Surfin' Bird," Brian and Stewie decide to take matters into their own hands to ensure that the song will never be heard again! On the verge of tears, Peter goes to every record store in Quahog to track down his beloved jingle, and he runs into a familiar face and ends up hanging out with Jesus Christ.

Mort Goldman accidentally steps into Stewie's time machine and goes back in time to 1939 Poland, and Brian and Stewie follow to retrieve him. When they find him, the Nazis invade and Mort is taken to Germany, where Stewie and Brian must go to save him, as well as find a way back to the present.

Peter gets a lasting supply of gasoline for the year, so the family decides to use it to take a road trip to the Grand Canyon. They pack up and hit the road, but it takes them a while to realize that they had forgotten to bring Stewie with them; when they do, they must make their way home posthaste.

Eight-year-old Brian (who is 56 in dog years) seems to have lost a step or two, so Peter gets a new talking dog, New Brian, to "take some of the load off" the old one, who doesn't like the idea at all.

Peter's boss Angela sends him back to the third grade so that he can qualify for a work promotion. Meanwhile, Brian, Frank Sinatra Jr. and Stewie open the coolest club in Quahog.

After being pregnant for seven years, Bonnie finally gives birth to a beautiful baby girl named Susie! Stewie quickly falls for the little tyke and vows to do anything to win her heart and get in her diaper. Meanwhile, Joe borrows $20,000 from a bookie to pay for Bonnie's medical bills, but then plans to steal the money from Mr. Pewterschmidt to pay his debt.

Peter is injected with the gay gene as part of a scientific experiment to determine whether or not homosexuality is a learned trait or something that people are born with. He ends up in a gay relationship and winds up in a "straight camp".

Peter finds an old winning raffle ticket from 1989 that entitles him a golf outing with O.J. Simpson. After befriending him, Peter brings O.J. home home to meet the family. However, the people of Quahog aren't too fond of the former running back.

Lois gets a job working for FOX News and has to do a report on a liberal filmmaker. However, she loses the job when her story implicates a conservative radio host.

Meg becomes extremely religious, and tries to convert Brian from Atheism. Meanwhile, after the family visits a Star Trek convention, Stewie kidnaps the entire cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation and forces them to hang out with him.

Brian and Stewie attempt to rally Quahog to try and legalize marijuana.

Stewie starts going to the gym with Peter after he gets beaten up by Joe's baby daughter Susie, but just when it seems that his hard work is paying off, Peter reveals that he's been giving him anabolic steroid. Meanwhile, Chris begins dating a popular girl at school, only to see her popularity subside.

Brian is devastated to learn that his ex-girlfriend Jillian is getting married until he meets The Hills star Lauren Conrad. Though Brian begins to think he and Conrad are the perfect match, he finds his heart may still belong to Jillian.

Peter imagines his friends and family in three of Stephen King's most famous works. Stand by Me parody - Twelve-year old Peter, Quagmire, Cleveland and Joe travel along a railroad track on a journey of self-discovery. Misery parody - Brian is injured in a bad car crash only to be "rescued" by his "number one fan," Stewie. The Shawshank Redemption parody - Cleveland and Peter become fast friends in prison.

Peter learns from a psychic through a palm reading that he had a fascinating past life in the 17th century as Griffin Peterson, a dignified English gentleman who vied for the love of Lady Redbush in the newly founded American colony of Quahog.