6x17 I'm OK, You're OK

[7.2/10] There’s a line from The Simpsons where Homer tells Bart, “When a woman says nothing’s wrong, that means everything’s wrong. And when a woman says everything’s wrong, that means everything’s wrong.” It’s a bit sexist, but I think Gilmore Girls is gesturing at the same idea here. Both Lorelai and Rory have nominally resolved any issues with their significant others, and things are supposedly fine, but you can tell in the wounded look behind Lorelai’s eyes when she finds out about the bag from Anna, and in the vacant way Rory lies about why she didn’t answer Logan’s calls, there is rot in the wood of both relationships, even if it hasn’t made it to the surface yet.

There’s interesting layers to that tack. It puts Rory and Lorelai in the same boat. For Rory, she has to admit that Logan is right on some logical level -- that he very likely believed that they were broken up when he slept with Honor’s friends and that he would not and has not been unfaithful to her, at least based on his own understanding of their relationship status. But some of the best conflicts come when there’s a clash between what is rationally true and what is emotionally resonant.

Rory can’t necessarily fault Logan for what he did. After all, it’s believable that someone as new at relationships as him would (a.) interpret a big fight as a break-up rather than a bump in the road (not to keep reverting back to Friends for this “on a break”-style fight, but Chandler had the same issue with Monica in one episode) and (b.) seek comfort in his old habits when he thought things had ended. But at the same time, she also can’t deny her own feelings of being hurt by it, of being almost unable to look at Logan, to speak to him, even as she puts up a front of normalcy.

Her friend reunion and reconciliation with Paris is sweet, and her hallway confessional from Logan seems to set things right, but there’s emotions at the bottom of this that can’t be swept away by Logan’s facts, which is what makes things so difficult and so interesting when two major figures in a show are acting so in character and yet at such cross purposes.

There’s a similar vibe for Lorelai here. She is trying with all her might to be cool about this whole long lost daughter situation, even as it results in she and Luke having to postpone their wedding. She doesn’t want to pressure Luke about it, she doesn’t want to snoop in on Anna, and she tries very hard to shut Rory down before even inching down that path.

But when she tells Luke that he needs a new duffel bag when chaperoning April’s field trip, and he, as is typical, brushes the suggestion off, only to show up with a new bag from Anna’s show when he returns, Lorelai is, understandably, a bit miffed, even if she tries not to show it. And like Logan, Luke has a reasonable explanation for this (much much lesser) offense -- that he didn’t ask for the bag, that it was sent to him without his knowledge, and that he’ll get rid of it if it bothers Lorelai.

Lorelai, like Rory, wants to be okay with this, doesn’t want to be the fiancee who gets precious about her future-husband’s luggage, but it’s another brick in the wall of Lorelai’s understandable discomfort with this situation. She too is pretending that everything’s “OK” when there’s real issues bothering her that would be better let out rather than kept behind that veneer.

Issues like the fact that it’s been months and Luke still hasn’t properly introduced Lorelai to April. I mean, what the hell Gilmore Girls. I can totally buy Luke wanting to give April a little time to acclimate to having a new parent in her life before he starts introducing a step family into the picture. And I can totally understand him wanting to ensure that he gets some quality one-on-one time with her so that they can make up for lost time and really bond. But what I cannot buy is a version of Luke who would not introduce the most important person in his world to his newfound daughter, and I especially cannot imagine a version of him who would not, at the very least, explain to Lorelai why he’s doing what he’s doing rather than just expecting her to butt out quietly. This storyline continues to be entirely out of character for Luke, and it means the show is laying the groundwork for a break-up a flimsy and unsatisfying foundation.

He’s not the only one acting out of character in this storyline either. I can totally buy Lorelai not wanting to make a fuss, and not wanting to confront Luke about why she’s been firewalled from April’s life. As Mrs. Bloom pointed out, that’s in keeping with a lot of her behavior regarding her daughter with respect to boys Lorelai didn’t approve of like Jess or Logan. But the other side of the coin is that Lorelai is something of a schemer, and so even if she wouldn’t come at Luke directly about this, she seems far more likely to say something like “Hey, Miss Patty is having a winter pageant for kids next week, why don’t you and I take April to it, that way we could all get to know one another better?” rather than just staying mum this entire time.

Again, the issues the show is dealing with are real and compelling in their own way, but don’t fit the characters as we know them, which makes the entire conflict feel false.

Speaking of people acting out of character, I was disappointed that Mrs. Kim didn’t cast Zach off into the bowels of hell when he expressed his desire to marry Lane. She was supposed to be our last line of defense against Zach saddling Lane with his idiocy for the rest of forever. But at least the show laid the groundwork there, with Mrs. Kim gradually finding a tolerance for her daughter’s different way of life, and she and Zach finding common ground and the basis for a mutual understanding over Lane’s glasses.

The bit with Mrs. Kim insisting that Zach write a hit (and showing a surprisingly strong understanding of melody and catchiness -- presumably from her girls’ singing group days) in order to show that he can provide for Lane is a cute one, though. And while I still wish she’d banish Zach to the ends of the Earth rather than welcome him into her family, it’s still touching when she coaxes him to (re-)propose, and gives the couple her grandmother’s ring to seal the deal. It’s a bit of fun and sweetness in an episode otherwise founded on couples trending in the wrong direction.

But this episode leans more into the fun and silliness for most of its run than it does into the heavier stuff. In fact, it’s a remarkably old school episode of Gilmore Girls in several ways, with Lorelai and Rory gallivanting about Stars Hollow, freaking out about a visit from Richard and Emily (which proved expectedly hilarious), and crossing swords with Michel at the inn.

That, however, just makes “I’m OK, You’re OK” a meta-example of its own idea. It’s an episode where both Luke and Logan are mostly absent, with only a conspicuously ignored ringing cell phone to hint at their presence. It’s an episode full of comedy and mother-daughter fun and the usual cheery banter that makes everything seem like business as usual on the show. But there’s those hints -- the cell phone, the bag, the briefly pained looks in the Gilmore Girls eyes -- to show that dark clouds are on the horizon, however bright and funny things seem right now.