Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer 1964

[7.4/10] Someday, somebody will come along who can judge Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer fairly. I am not that person. I watched this special plenty of times as a kid, to the point that it’s songs and characters and animated whimsy have been burned into my brain. If you want an objective look at the special’s strengths and weaknesses, you’ve come to the wrong place.

But part of what’s made this mini-movie such an indelible part of the holiday season is its message -- that misfits have a place in this world. That message is understandably simplified for a young audience. There’s not really a great plot-based cause for why the other residents of the North Pole change their minds and decide to accept their counterparts with shiny anatomy or a desire to fix teeth, but it’s cheery nonetheless.

That’s one of those little details that strikes you coming to something like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer as an adult. The tongue-in-cheek rebuke of the Rudolph story in the modern age is that the tale’s true moral is, “Society will exclude you for your differences unless it discovers that they are exploitable.” But the bigwigs at Santa’s Workshop apologize to those they excluded before any of them realizes that Rudolph’s nose is the answer to the blizzard that threatens to cancel Xmas. It’s a small touch, but an important one.

It’s important if only because, not for nothing, every person with authority in this movie (give or take a friendly snowman who sounds suspiciously like Burl Ives) is a complete and total asshole up until that point. The Head Elf constantly demeans Hermey and tells him he’ll always be a failure. The coach for the young caribou bans Rudolph from class because of his abnormality. The father of Rudolph’s crush tells the red-nosed reindeer to stay the hell away from his daughter. For being residents of a magical land devoted to spreading joy around the world, the people in charge are utterly reprehensible.

But even they pale in comparison to Rudolph’s father, Donner, a famed member of Santa’s sleigh team, and Old Saint Nick himself. Donner is instantly embarrassed by his son, forced him to hide his nose, and demeans his only child over a birth defect as a “matter of self-respect.” (And, while it doesn’t factor into the story, he’s a sexist to boot.)

Even he’s outclassed by Santa Claus, who seems like he’s in a constant bad mood. He grumbles about not wanting to eat. He all but tells the elves that their charming little working song is a terrible annoyance. Worst of all, when Rudolph’s red nose is revealed during the reindeer games, Santa tells Donner that he should be ashamed of himself.

The guy’s a jerk. Heck, everyone with even a whit of power here is a jerk. But that just makes it all the more sympathetic when Rudolph and Hermey depart the North Pole in search of someplace they can be independent misfits and accepted despite, or even in because of, the way they differ from the norm. All we basically see of them in their home is the two of them being debased by authority figures writ large, with only one empathetic doe, Clarice, showing either of them any kindness.

Of course, Rudolph the Red-Nosed reindeer is a fairly simple fable on those terms. There’s never much of a reason given for why people are so repulsed by Rudolhps’ glowing nose or why it’s such a tragedy that Hermey wants to be a dentist. They just are. Likewise, the townsfolk don’t have an equal or opposite reason for turning around and accepting them. At best, you can chalk it up to absence making the heart grow fonder, and the North Pole’s residents having a change of heart after they hear what Rudolph and Hermey went through when they felt so ostracized and excluded.

The truth is that the film’s truest charms come in its music, its craft, and its character. The special is way more packed with songs than I’d remembered, with barely three minutes of dialogue passing before some reindeer or elf or talking snowman bursts into song.

Sometimes, those tunes tie into the narrative, like the would-be title track or Rudolph and Hermey’s misfit song. But sometimes the special just stops so that Santa can sing about being “the King of Jingling” or Sam the Snowman can croon about how nice Xmas trees look in silver and gold. But regardless of their utility to the story, John Marks’s melodies are jaunty and memorable, having burrowed into my gray matter for decades.

The same goes for the film’s adorable stop-motion animated look. There’s a rough-around-the-edges feel to a lot of the designs here, but that just adds to their charm and the playbox feel of the special’s word. Rudolph is appropriately adorable. The elves are whimsical with enough variation to keep things fun. Santa and Yukon Cornelius have animated facial hair that gives them a cartoony feel. The big furry Snow Monster is iconic. The misfit toys are creatively-designed. And every woodland creature and animal friend in the picture has a cute, playtime feel amid the winter wonderland.

That’s important when, despite its commendable moral, Rudolph is pretty light on story. What it lacks in plot, it makes up for in character. The title character is eminently sympathetic, feeling the sting of his ostracism, trying to keep his friends and family from suffering on his behalf, showing bravery when his parents and paramour are in danger, and exuding glee and gratitude when the thing he’s been made to be ashamed of all this time turns out to be the thing that saves Xmas.

Likewise, Hermey has his own endearing workaday qualities, doing his best to blend his interest in dentistry with his job as a toymaker to no avail, making the occasional dry remark, and taking the initiative when his efforts fail. He’s got a sincere and nerdy likability that livens his scenes.

In an equal and opposite way to Hermey’s button-down sad sackery, Yukon Cornelius might be legitimately crazy, with his crew of household pets as a sled dog team, his boisterous extroverted bent toward anything and everything, and his fickle, pickaxe-licking obsession with gold, silver, and eventually even peppermint. He’s an outsized delight every time he takes the screen, whether’s he’s welcoming our heroes to his traveling party or regaling them with tales of how bumbles bounce.

Thinly drawn though they may be, that cast of characters, in addition to a heap of inventively-designed misfit toys and a friendly snowman make you want to hang around these wintertime wanderers, no matter how thin the tale they spin may be.

And yet, after all they go through, the antagonizing “Bumble” is defeated and reformed; Hermey opens his own dental practice, and Rudolph becomes a hero not only for guiding Santa’s sleigh through a blizzard, but for keeping his word and taking Santa to the Island of Misfit Toys so that each of those unlucky playthings can still find a home.

I’d be lying if I said I could honestly appraise the success of that tale. There’s parts of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer that are utterly bonkers, from the jerkassery of the authority figures, to the random deposits of musical interludes, to the climax hinging on headbutting a yeti in the crotch and wrestling him off a cliff.

But the songs, the friendly faces, and the heartening message that even those who feel like they don’t belong deserve happiness and acceptance and those who break from the norm still have a great deal to offer the world, earns this special a place as a rightfully-hailed holiday classic. Whether due to quality or charm or simple nostalgia, it deserved to go down in history.