The Descent 2005

it's not perfect but I think it's pretty solid for a horror movie. The film has a great grasp on tone, and the sets are amazing. Simon Bowles did a fantastic job as the production designer, and the sets they use, combined with the way they're lit, could fall almost anyone into thinking this is a real cave.

What I like about The Descent, is that it's not your typical horror movie. There's no cheesy love story going on with underdeveloped characters you care nothing about. Believe it or not, there are actually subtleties in the film. Horror movies use different tactics to scare you, and a lot of them use the same ones over and over, but I thought The Descent was pretty versatile. It's not just a movie filled with, "Boo! Ha ha! You were startled."

The cave environment brings on a feeling of claustrophobia, the lighting is perfect for a horror movie, and they have the right excuse for it to be dark. The cinematography is well done, it has a good score that helps set the tone without forcing it on you, it achieves what it set out to accomplish, and that's the most important. Again, it's not a perfect movie. Sure, a girl has a conversation after being stabbed in the throat and the characters could be a little more rounded, but I think Neil Marshall proved himself with this movie in some way. What I love about Neil Marshall, is that I know that he enjoys what he's doing.

Not the first time I've watched this one but after giving it another view with fresh eyes, I have to give this one a 5 rating "Meh" at the very best. If you suffer from speluncaphobia, claustrophobia, cleithrophobia, or nyctophobia (fear of caves, enclosed spaces, being trapped/locked in, and darkness) this movie will probably really be a nerve-jangler. Watching it with fresh eyes, however, it's not so much "scary" as overdramatic and utterly ridiculous. So. Many. Holes. in the story, in the plot, in everything. None of the characters are memorable or likable...not even "Sarah" (played by Shauna Macdonald), the bereaved widow/mother. I will say, however, that my heart was moved by her performance when she came to in the hospital and discovered that her child had been killed in the auto accident. She played that part brilliantly, and - mercifully - briefly. I'm assuming the producers/directors/writers wanted to make "Juno" (played by Natalie Mendoza, whose headshot below, incidentally, is far too Photoshop'd to do her justice) the antagonist/villain but they couldn't really pull it off. She came across as a female actress trying to come across as a "tough guy" and it really didn't work. The rest of the cast were such bit-part players that I couldn't remember who was who, who did what, which went missing and how, etc etc. That's how vanilla this entire film was. The creatures were never explained, although a half-hearted sentence was thrown in (for good measure, I suppose; it really didn't say anything we hadn't already figured out by this point) and the lame explanation that was given could be easily debunked: If they were, indeed, "creature who had adapted to living in complete darkness and were totally blind" then why would they go above ground into the daylight to supposedly hunt and bring their prey/kills down into the darkness? Were these "Mole Men" or "Bat People" or what? To make it even more ludicrous, they at one point had to throw in a "Mole/Bat Female", completely with developed breasts that hung down because she - like the others - moved on all fours (hands and knees) like any other nocturnal animal, I suppose. This "mole/bat female" thing became (of course) enraged when one of her offspring attacked the humans and got killed or wounded for its troubles. And so on and so forth.... So many holes in the entire story and it isn't worth my time to sit here and explain everything away. Just suffice it to say that it wasn't a complete waste of time - it had its moments but IMO the "fear factor" was due more to the tight crawl-spaces and harrowing tunnels they had to traverse, more than the "mole people" - but just go into it realizing the plot is as thin as wet tissue paper and just as sturdy, and there's really nothing to buy into about this. Would I watch it? Yeah...if you're bored, it's not a bad way to completely waste 93 minutes. But now that I've watched it with fresh eyes, I won't bother seeing it again. And the ending is just....silly, for lack of a better word.

I heard it was "the best thriller since Aliens" from more than one person, and that gave me high hopes. What I got was a mix between something almost Saw-like, Alien-like, and something I have never seen before.

The best parts of the movie had nothing do with the creatures. The revenge killing, the literal pool of blood, the accidental killings, the claustrophobia—all that was done perfectly. I just thought the cave dwellers held it all back due to their cliché and predictable nature. How many movies have you seen with monsters that only live to kill? Hundreds. Monsters in a horror movie are as predictable as Big Bird in an episode of Sesame Street. Without the monsters, the movie would have been less predictable. Anyway, the cave dwellers were nothing more than a dumber version of Orcs mixed with your standard jump-out-generic-monster.

The cinematography was great, but it didn't impress me. The plot-twist in the very end (of the Unrated Edition) is, sadly, just another cliché used in almost every movie anymore.

It was a fun movie. The upside-down killing is one of the coolest killings I have ever seen in a movie. I can't deny that this movie had its moments. But a few less clichés would have made this so much more fulfilling.

A little predictable in terms of plot events, for the most part, but not bad. It certainly made me feel claustrophobic, and reinforced my opinion that people who willingly go into caves are completely nuts. I had a bit of a hard time telling the women apart, too, except for Juno and Holly, due to similar sort of features and most of the movie being either flashlights or red flare lighting. The jumpscares were good, the sound design was very good (if annoying due to the jumpscares having huge spikes in sound and music usually), and the sets were great. Not a movie I'll rewatch, but not bad.

The part I don't understand is why Juno stabbing Beth in the throat by mistake was played by everyone as some sort of betrayal. It was an honest accident; you shouldn't sneak up on people in a cave full of monsters. I get Juno lying about it, but Beth being like "don't trust her"? And then Sarah stabbing Juno and leaving her to die because of it? Why?

And clearly the ending where Sarah makes it out just fine and then it turns out it was a dream and she was still in the cave isn't the canon ending, since there's a sequel. I admit, the story was just interesting enough for me to go watch that now, might as well.