Beetle Bailey, the private who would rather drop and nap than drop and "do 20" is the wise cracking joker of Camp Swampy, where befuddled General Halftrack still hasn't heard from the Pentagon, grumbling Sgt. Snorkle has never had a date, Beetle hasn't washed his socks, and Cooke still makes those high-bouncing meatballs.
Sgt. Snorkle and Beetle each are given ten day furloughs as a reward for their performance in the war games.
The army is playing war games and Beetle is picked to run messages between the regiments. Failing miserably, he manages to get everyone captured except Zero and himself.
Sergeant Snorkel gets advice from the camp chaplain as how to get along better with his men. The chaplain tells him to be nicer and take an interest in their hobbies and help them with their work. The platoon thinks that Sergeant Snorkle has lost his mind and attack him to return him to his old self.
Sergeant Snorkle wants to make Camp Swampy look better so he sends away for a Japanese leechee tree. Zero is put in charge of planting it. He accidentally kills it and desperately needs a replacement before Sergeant Snorkle gets back.
Sergeant Snorkle tells beetle and Zero that they must pick up a Civil War statue and bring it back to Camp Swamp. One the return trip the boys break the statue and must come up with a replacement so they won't get caught.
Sergeant Snorkle assigns everyone to KP duty so they try and get even by making his chili extra hot.
Sergeant Snorkle's platoon is selected to play a concert for a group of visiting officers. Unfortunately nobody in the platoon can play an instrument. They decide to play a record and just pretend to play. Will their plan work or will it backfire?
Beetle looses his promotion to Sergeant Snorkle's dog.