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Private Notes
Protégé hacker Nicole Winters (Emily Heller) who works for "Special Projects", an electronic surveillance governmental agency, receives a call from elderly Special Agent Henry Topple (John Hodgman) informing her that she has just been assigned to him to spy on the general public.
Agent Topple checks up on how Winters is settling into her new job at "Special Projects". Topple asks Winters about her surveillance of e-mails and in turn reveals his lack of understanding with modern computing. The conversation then trails off into the secret history of how fake mustaches were involved with the United States' national security.
Agent Topple instructs Winters to hack a website. It is revealed that Topple merely used Winters's hacking expertise to remember the password to his old GeoCities e-mail. After Topple asks what e-mails are in his inbox, Winters finds an urgent message from 1998 on a secret project involving Topple's past partner Logan and a "test subject".
Agent Topple calls Winters about a supposed alert from PRISM on a cyberterrorist group called "Evite" infiltrating their networks and a subsequent attack. In the course of conversation, it is revealed that it is only an invitation from Topple's co-worker Doug for his retirement party described as a "big blow-out." Blaming the terror alert from PRISM on boredom, Winters brings up Facebook, a social network. Topple then calls Facebook "the smartest way to keep people dumb since we started fluoridating the water." Winters then admonishes Topple for having her to have to fill out a "88-J" incident form because of revealing classified information so candidly. Since "88-J" incident forms are only filled out by supervisors, Topple realizes Winters was promoted to become Topple's superior.
Winters calls Topple back since she was busy with a briefing. As Topple was not invited to the meeting, he passed the time watching telenovelas. Winters complains about his unprofessionalism and reveals that she had not slept well because of a list of troubles the night before. It turns out that the troubles were all perpetrated by Topple's ability to use national security at his disposal as he is still upset over Winters's recent promotion.
Topple finds his personal accounts with Walgreens, Amtrak, MCI, and so forth have been hacked because of Winters. In retaliation, Topple orders a "toilet water sample" and finds that Winters is a drug user, which is grounds for termination. Coming to a compromise, Winters discloses to Topple her secret project: stopping a North Korean computer virus. Per their agreement, Topple gets to collaborate with Winters on the secret project as well as getting full credit for it.
Topple sends Winters a fax of his analysis of the North Korean computer virus called "Staxnut". As the two converse on the computer virus, it is revealed that the computer virus could replace all American digital content with North Korean flag dancing. Given that North Korea is busy producing flags, there is still time to stop the virus. However, Topple realizes it would wipe out electronic dance music (and other media) he loathes and thus realizes his dilemma.
Winters informs Topple that she called Chief Deputy Rollins and that Rollins does not want Topple on the Staxnut project. Annoyed that he is not involved with the project, Topple lists off the people he has killed. In the course of the conversation, Winters receives an alert that the Chief Deputy was murdered.
