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Private Notes
Tom decides to become a drama teacher, setting up a school in their flat. For his first lesson he manages to convince Linda's sister Sugar to learn from his wisdom. Jez and Suze have a new addition to their family, a life-size baby doll which is irresponsibly left in the care of Linda.
Linda and Tom are shocked to find a coffin in their living room, even more so when they realise that their landlady Beryl is inside. They start worrying that they'll be homeless and thrown out on the street… until a gorgeous bloke named Pedro turns up.
Tom brings a cat home in the hope of training it to work in television, making them stars. Meanwhile Linda starts writing to a serial killer in prison, and when he turns up on her doorstep they plan to run away together… but then he falls for Tom.
It's Tom's 30th birthday and he wants to wake up to Bucksfizz. Linda surprises him by arranging a party piece, bringing Jez and Suze around to do a birthday dance for him. But Tom wanted the drink, not the group. Tom's dull, boring and prudish parents come to visit, so Tom tries to be more discreet about his sexuality. He persuades Linda to flirt with his dad in order to scare them away. But everything goes wrong when Tom discovers that they have a secret of their own.
Tom and Linda go out clubbing and get completely smashed. Tom spends the night with a weird security guard, while Linda wakes up in bed with a woman. She's annoyed at first, until she realises that they did more than just sleep. Meanwhile Beryl goes back on the game, and Linda later gets arrested for soliciting. ""I said to them, do I look like a solicitor? No!""
Tom gets to appear in a sofa advert, while Linda stars working on a factory line, squirting mashed potato and flirting with her male colleague. Tom makes friends with a celebrity and brings him home, but he hates Linda (""Butt out or get pretty!""), causing friction in the flat.
