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Private Notes
Aunt Agatha wants Bertie to marry Honoria Glossop so that she will mold his character and infuse much needed strong blood in the Wooster line. But old chum Bingo Little is in love with her, so Bertie hatches a scheme to set things straight. Luckily, Jeeves has arrived to save Bertie from his own schemes (and hangovers).
After a round of golf with Barmy Fotheringay-Phipps, Bertie find trouble in the form of Bobbie Wickham, first involving hot-water bottle piercing, then by giving away Aunt Agatha's dog to a broadway producer. Meanwhile Tuppy's become infatuated with an Opera singer and Jeeves hatches a plan involving a little concert in which Bertie must sing.
Uncle George has become engaged to a young waitress and Aunt Agatha wants Bertie to offer her a hundred pounds to end the scandalous engagement, but Jeeves has other plans. Then it's off to Twing Hall where Lady Wickhammersley has banned gambling due to an unfortunately incident in which Lord Wickhammersley lost the East Wing with a bad hand. So Bertie, Bingo, and Jeeves start gambling on events in the village fair, such as the Boys and Girls Mixed Animal Potato Race and the Mothers Sack Race.
Part 1 of 2. Brought to Brinkley Court by Aunt Dahlia to give prizes at the Market Snodsbury Grammar School, Bertie comes up with a scheme to both help Gussie Fink-Nottle's new romance with Madeline Basset as well as get himself out of the prize-giving.
Part 2 of 2. To get Gussie to propose to Madeline Jeeves slips a little something into his orange juice before he presents prizes at the grammar school. Unfortunately, so does Bertie. Things go downhill from there when Bertie rings the fire bell.
Aunt Dahlia sends Bertie to sneer at an 18th century cow creamer in order to reduce the price for Uncle Tom. But when he makes a mess of the job rival silver collector Sir Watkin Bassett gets ahold of it. So Bertie goes off to Totleigh Towers where everyone either wants Bertie to steal the cow-creamer, or threatens to beat him to a jelly if he does. Stiffy Byng, Stinker Pinker, and Aunt Dahlia being of the former category, and the Amateur Dictator Roderick Spode and Sir Watkin Bassett being of the latter.
In order to help overcome his fear of Roderick Spode and Sir Watkin Bassett, Gussie Fink-Nottle writes down a notebook full of scornful thoughts about each of them. When he misplaces the notebook it falls into all the wrong peoples' hands, and desirable engagements are broken and undesirable ones formed like never before.
Bertie is called to Westcombe-on-Sea by Aunt Agatha, delaying a vacation in the south of France. There he meets a girl by the name of Aline Hemmingway whom she wishes him to marry. She and her brother leave pearls as security for a hundred pound loan from Bertie. But when both the Hemmingways' pearls and Aunt Agatha's pearls disappear, trouble arises. Meanwhile, Bertie runs into Biffy Biffen, who has lost his fiancé in the most remarkable manner. Unfortunately, he is unable to remember her last name - in fact he is unable to remember almost anything.
When Bertie takes up the trombone, he moves to the country due to complaints from other tennants. The combination of these two evens cause Jeeves to give his notice, who is immediately snapped up by Chuffy Chuffnell who owns the villiage to which Bertie has moved. He also owns Chuffnell Hall, but wishes to sell it to the American, Stoker, so that he can afford to marry said American's daughter, Pauline, to whom Bertie was once engaged himself.
This one is rather complicated. After being turned down for the nomination of chairman of the dining commitee at the Drones, Bertie runs into Pauline Stoker, who is in London to buy her wedding dress and is being followed by a strange fellow with a ginger beard. She asks Bertie to come be a body guard. Meanwhile, her father is unable to turn Chuffnell Hall into a Hotel, so he looks into turning it into a sanitarium run by none other than Sir Roderick Glossop. The combination of Stokers, Glossops, and Chuffnells is bad news for Bertie's image, and his only hope is... the boys from the Drones dressed up as Minstrels?
Bertie begins to think that having a child might be nice. Of course the first step, Jeeves reminds him, is getting married. Once again thoughts turn towards Bobbie Wickham. Meanwhile, fellow Drones are in love: Tuppy with a dog-lover in the country (and not with Cousin Angela as he should be), and Bingo (as usual) with a waitress named Mabel. Ensuing events involve a rather nasty rugby match, tossing pots through greenhouses, public speaking in front of young ladies, and plans to soften Bingo's Uncle to the thought of his nephew marrying someone in a lower social strata.
In order to escape the wrath of Honoria Glossop and Aunt Agatha, Jeeves and Bertie board an oceanliner heading for New York. Unfortunately, Bertie is landed with the task of looking after Wilmot Malvern, a lad long cooped up with his mother Lady Malvern. He turns out to be a limpet of the worst sort with the knack for clinging to Woosters. On the ship Bertie also runs into Tuppy, who's off to America to become an importer of cars to Britain. Once in New York, the mother's boy breaks loose onto the nightclub scene with disasterous results, and Tuppy meets with similar lack of success when he realizes he'll have to buy more than one car at a time and that the steering wheel's on the wrong side.
The aunt of Bertie's poet friend, Rocky, wants him to go out and live the New York nightlife and write her weekly letters so that she might experience it vicariously. Rocky, however can't stand anything but his cabin the the wilderness of Long Island, so Jeeves agrees to undergo the rigors and report back to Rocky. Another friend, Bicky, loves New York, but his uncle thinks he should be in Colorado. Jeeves suggests a bit of deception on his part as well, which works fine until relatives of both friends show up in New York, both believing that Bertie's flat belongs to their respective nephews. Solutions involve a lot of running about acting silly and quite a bit of handshaking as well.
Cyril Bassington-Bassington arrives in New York under specific instructions from Aunt Agatha for Bertie to keep him out of theatrical circles - instructions which of course Cyril rips up before Bertie can read them. So he lands a part in a Broadway musical called Ask Dad! and Bertie tours the USA with the show. Meanwhile, Bertie's struggling artist friend, Corky, needs help convincing his uncle that the girl he wants to marry is suitable. Unfortunately Jeeves' solution may be too good.
After a wild night with Catsmeat Potter-Pirbright, Gussie ends up in stir for wading about Trafalgar fountain looking for Newts. For purely simple and logical reasons Bertie goes to Devirill Hall pretending to be Gussie in order to win the aunts' approval of his marriage to Madeline Basset, and Gussie must go under the name Bertie Wooster to woo Catsmeat's fiancé, Gertrude Winkworth.
Sir Watkin Bassett is writing his memories, which could prove scandalous to everyone in his life, so various members of society, such as Madeline Bassett, and Lady Florence Cray -- to whom Bertie has recently become engaged -- all want Bertie to steal them. Stiffy Byng is producing the village entertainment for Totleigh-on-the-Wold involving Mike & Pat Cross talk between Gussie and Spode, and a song by her betrothed, Stinker Pinker.
Bingo wears a false beard and pretends to be a Bolshevik to impress his latest love, and Aunt Dahlia gets Bertie to become an art thief in order to convince a writer to print her story in Milady's Boudoir.
Back in New York, Bertie comissions the artist with whom he's fallen in love to paint a portrait of Aunt Agatha, and Tuppy's there trying to sell his recipe for Cock-A-Leekie soup to Slingsby of Slingsby's Soups. When there's a car accident involving the nasty Lucious Pim, and Claude and Eustace show up, things become of the sort in which one finds Jeeves' intervention invaluable.
Bertie spends much time putting the old Wooster brain to use in devising schemes to arrange the meeting of two tycoons. However, A more immediate concern is Stilton Cheesewright and Lady Florence Craye, both of whom hold vastly differing yet equally unpleasant opinions of Bertie - the former takes offense at his drinking and time spent with the later, while Florence thinks that he has possibilities. The final scene involving Abraham Lincoln climbing up the spire of the Empire State Building, amongst other things.
Bingo's in love with another waitress, and the old Rosie M. Banks gag comes up again, this time with an unfortunate twist. Unfortunately New York does not seem to be the haven it once was, and the Glossops are in town looking to marry off Honoria. Luckily, Blaire Egleston is in love with her and Bertie has just the plan to push him to propose. But he may have pushed too hard.
Once more, Stilton Cheesewright and Lady Florence Craye loom large on the horizon, with differing opinions this time, not only with regard to Bertram Wooster, but his moustache as well. While Stilton works out in how many places he will break Bertie's spine, and how he's going to do it without altering the Wooster dart skills (for he's drawn his name for the annual Drones Darts Tournament) Jeeves must help Aunt Dahlia with her pearl-troubles, Percy Gorringe with his love troubles, and Bertie with his upper-lip troubles.
Certain members of the household believe there is a curse held over Totleigh Towers by a small African totem. So Bertie gets involved in another retrieval project while the Gussie-Madeline romance has developed it's final difficulties.
The Ganymede Club book has turned up missing, and Jeeves must return it at all costs. Madeline Bassett's wedding doesn't proceed as smoothly as planned.
