In the first Christmas special, sketches include Unsuitable Bloke auditioning for a singing part in a theatre production meant for an 8-year-old girl and Donovan annoying Mrs Johnson at her husband's funeral.
Unsuitable Bloke applies to be a baby in a Snugglies nappy commercial
Unsuitable Bloke becomes offended when he's not allowed to be a page 3 model for The Sun newspaper, Lucas embarrasses a doctor, Donovan and Mrs Johnson bump into one another at the garden centre, Clive overdoes his weekend activities with Curtis, a health and safety inspector causes problems for Fly Man and Gloria serves a customer wanting bread. Other features include a fight between 2 men in a china shop, prisoners trying to escape from a war camp but are caught when one prisoner keeps breaking wind and Lenny keeps laughing and all the usual tomfoolery
Unsuitable Bloke applies to be a Cox for a rowing team, Big Tramp cons people out of money by pretending he has a fatal illness that killed his family and nation, Donovan goes on a coach trip with Mrs Johnson but is kicked off and Gloria embarrasses a customer wanting a lads' magazine. All this plus a guest appearance by Uri Gellar, a fight between 2 people in a pet shop, a cardinal and priest hiding from the King's soldiers but are caught when the cardinal keeps trumping and the priest keeps laughing all the usual stuff
Fly Man goes to see a psychiatrist and then his son Jonathan's teacher when the boy is being bullied at school, Unsuitable Bloke stands in for a dentist at a dental surgery, Donovan embarrasses Mrs Johnson at the supermarket where she works as a checkout cashier, the Hotel Porters have difficulty carrying a heavy trunk and Gloria makes a customer take out all the petrol in his car when he is £2 short to pay. Also includes a Jurassic Park like sketch where 2 hunters are being chased by a dinosaur and hide in a hut where one of them keeps farting causing Lenny to constantly laugh and for them to be eaten and all the regular stuff
Mrs Johnson takes her son to see Santa Claus in his grotto at the town centre but are shocked to discover that Donovan is dressed up as the jolly fellow, Fly Man and his wife go out for a meal where Fly Man has litter to eat, Big Tramp becomes a millionaire when he finds a lottery ticket amongst the rubbish and they have the winning numbers on, Lucas embarrasses a judge and Gloria refuses a customer to use the phone when there's been a serious accident. Other features include two gangsters hiding in a cake at a mafia boss' party but are caught when one gangster keeps trumping and Lenny keeps laughing and all the regular tomfoolery.
Unsuitable Bloke applies to be a hairdresser on a film set, Donovan sees Mrs Johnson at the library, the Hotel Porters accidentally kill a guest's cat and desperately try to replace it, Clive changes Curtis' name to Curtis Junior and Gloria serves a customer wanting toilet paper. All this plus 2 spies being caught when one keeps breaking wind and Lenny keeps laughing and all the regular mayhem
Gloria makes a customer take off his clothes when he can only pay for his petrol by cheque, Donovan bumps into Mrs Johnson at the record store, Clive has Curtis put under hypnosis and Unsuitable Bloke applies to be a shark hunter. Also features a submarine crew trying to be quiet so as not to be blown up by the enemy but are when one person keeps farting and Lenny keeps laughing and all the regular antics
Donovan bumps into Mrs Johnson at the chemist and Gloria deals with a robber with a gun. Also includes a sketch where two gangsters baby-sit a mafia boss' baby and must make sure nothing happens to it and tons more!
Mrs Johnson goes to the cinema with her boyfriend Franklin but Donovan spoils their evening, Gloria has a western showdown with a customer wanting petrol, Roy comes home after his first day of being a prison officer but has forgotten to lock the prisoners up again after tea time and in the Polar Bear Family sketch, Barry breaks both his arms. Unsuitable Bloke auditions to be a dancer in the opening titles for the next James Bond film, ""Die Another Golden Death Twice Tomorrow"" but when he gets rejected, as it's only for women, he puts it down to being black and therefore gets the job. The end result shows him doing bad dancing and forward rolls. Also includes a fight between 2 vampires and loads more!
Donovan meets Mrs Johnson at her art class, Gloria deals with a woman wanting Lottery scratch-cards and Lucius T Kool III shows the new church anthem: a rendition of â€˜Shaft' but called â€˜Pope'. Also includes a fight between a detective and forensic and heaps more!
Donovan meets Mrs Johnson at the school kitchens, Pope is attacked by snipers, Gloria the angry petrol attendant deals with a man having a heart attack, Clive tries to twist his son Curtis' nightmares and in the Polar Bear Family sketch, Shane wants to be a journalist. The fight this episode shows Lenny Henry as a wise man having a fight with another wise man at the birth of Jesus.
Roy puts notes around the house so as he doesn't forget his wedding anniversary, Gloria the angry petrol pump attendant refuses to sell cigarettes to a man dressed as a schoolgirl, Clive tries to keep track of Curtis 24/7 by using a video camera, Pope displays his security service of nuns, Unsuitable Bloke applies to be a picture restorer but gets rejected, so he puts it down to being black and gets the job. Afterwards, he smokes when using meths to remove a stain on a painting, causing the painting to set alight. In the Polar Bear Family sketch, Barry tries to make sure he doesn't get tranquillized. Also includes The Essex Witch Project, a take on The Blair Witch Project and as a fish shop owner, Lenny Henry has a fight with one of his staff.
Donovan bumps into Mrs Johnson at the vets, Gloria the angry petrol pump attendant deals with a man chatting up the ladies. Lenny also makes fun of Howard Brown, the man in the Halifax adverts. In the Polar Bear Family sketch, Shane wants to learn fighting moves so as to beat his dad. Also includes a fight between 2 Arctic explorers and much more!
When a customer asks Gloria to ring the police because her boyfriend is being attacked, the cashier puts a bet on which man will win, President Umbeleke finally uses government funding sensibly to build a hospital and inappropriately to eject hedgehogs into space, Clive buys the house next to Curtis so he can secretly be with his son and in the Polar Bear Family sketch, Shane and Ian trick Barry into believing he has laid an egg. The series finishes with Mrs Johnson going out to a restaurant for an evening meal on Valentine's Day, believing it has been set up by her boyfriend Franklin but it is in fact Donovan's doing. The randy OAP proposes to Mrs Johnson and she accepts.