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Private Notes
Richard is wearing his wedding suit, but has forgotten about the secret curse that it possesses that might destroy his esteemed standing in society, but the added jeopardy might help those with erotic expectations from their entertainment. We’re at the Old Market in Hove and the guest is nuclear-bunker obsessed Angela Barnes.
They discuss whether we are all just characters in a video game played by an increasingly bored teenager, the secret dangers of hot water bottles, the pranks played on Angela by her swinging father and how Richard could be sued by the people of Brighton for lip damage, why comedians can’t meditate and a Valentine’s Day gesture to rival a Ferrero Rocher pyramid. Plus Angela’s excellent work on the Home Safe Collective.
Back at the Old Market in Hove for a second (separate) week and Richard has more disappointing reviews of local tourist attractions, plus news of a life-changing bin-based compensation. His guest is a man who is more Brighton than a stick of rock, it’s Stephen Grant.
Stephen tells us how he came within a heartbeat of being in Top Gear and might also have been in The Office were it not for excellent advice from his (ex) manager. Also the pros and cons of being followed by a film crew during his first Edinburgh Fringe, the disappointment of not flying in an air ambulance and whether it’s more impressive to lose weight by accident or design. Some classic old Emergency Questions are pulled out of the bag and there’s a more serious discussion about whether comedians should write their own material. Another lovely tour podcast. Do check out the gig guide to see if the show is coming near to you.
There’s a weird giddy atmosphere in the room at the Leeds City Varieties, but you’ll have to try and use the clues in this podcast to piece together what you think might have happened, because this week the guests are the supremely polite and sensible Mark and Dominic (aka Marlon and Paddy from Emmerdale Farm).
They chat about how to not let fame go to your head, the snobbishness directed at soap actors, Mark being Richard’s number one celebrity fan, what Julia Mackenzie thought of Richard’s acting skills, Dominic’s other life as a film director and what the Attack of the Adult Babies is all about, Zombie nights, Who Wants to be a Millionaire and much much more. Remember if you want to see the podcasts uncut, even the ones that we’re not able to broadcast, you have to come and see us LIVE! The people of Leeds will never forget this night!
We’re on the road still and at the Lowry in Salford where the lightest local headline is not really ripe for frivolity, but at least they are paying fitting tribute to their greatest painter. And it’s possible that the theatre is literally on fire, but Richard is not letting that stop him.The guest tonight is showbiz legend and punster extraordinaire, Jimmy Cricket and something that the RHLSTP audience might not be used to, proper jokes.
But amongst the silliness, Jimmy reveals some fabulous stories about the days of the working men’s clubs, the summer camps or Ireland, Laurel and Hardy’s last tour, working with the Honey Monster, being a Papal Knight and why he still has the hunger for treading the boards in his wellies. There’s more, how his This is Your Life almost got derailed by a chance meeting and a letter from his Mamie. To buy Jimmy’s DVD or find out about his live dates or performances of his play check out his website - https://www.jimmycricket.co.uk/
It’s a heart-warming, corny and hilarious hour of chat. But will Rich ask clean-living Jimmy THAT emergency question?
After last week’s respectful chat with the great Jimmy Cricket, the gloves are off and it’s time to spew up a gut load of filth with third time RHLSTP (plus guest for three Edinburgh podcasts) Sarah Millican.
But who will win the battle this time? Rich goes into a bit too much detail about a bout of food poisoning that, to be fair, he isn’t entirely finished with. But if fire can’t stop him, then neither can the squits. There’s a lot about poo, vomit, sperm and pleasuring yourself to Henry Kelly and kittens (as you’d expect) but there’s also a chance to find out Sarah’s favourite cruciferous vegetable. Plus find out why the last chapter of her audio book might seem a bit faster than the others, Rich’s skill at taking off bras, the cruelty and redundancy of children and whether workaholism is a positive or negative force for comedy. Plus how Sarah’s dad used his engineering skills to try and solve a tricky conundrum.
We’re at the swanky King’s Place in King’s Cross (with a few teething troubles with the radio mics- sorry audiophiles) for the next few weeks and Rich is amazed at people reviewing the queue to Platform 9 and 3/4 at the nearby station, but his guest is the bachelor comedian (for the next 3 days) Russell Howard.
They discuss footballing comedians, how Rich might be Russell’s Willy Wonka, how Russell’s got his first willy wonka, the difficulty of playing yourself when surrounded by brilliant actors, the real story behind Richard’s dismissal from “Good News” (it might not have been the Haribo at all), giving proper credit to writers, what it’s like to perform at an arena (or be in the audience if you’re Richard), an unhappy year at Bedford Modern School, Richard’s mental health, how to hire Russell Howard for £12 and whether chairs made out of newspapers are a good idea.
Another week has gone by and we’re at King’s Place again and Rich congratulates Kings Cross on another record breaking success and meets his new upmarket audience. His guest is actor turned waiter turned writer turned stand-up Sara Barron.
They chat about life in New York and what you do when your toilet isn’t working, waiting on the famous, they weirdness of ex-partners still being in the picture when a new relationship blossoms, the wonders of Warsaw Indiana and Rich’s interaction with his wife’s uncle, whether it’s possible to have kids and lose weight and still be a good parent, where men are going wrong/right with lovemaking and how dated plays from schooldays have become.
Rich has come back from his holiday for this and why wouldn’t he? But will his guest turn up this time? The bad news, if he doesn’t, is that Nish Kumar is ill... there’s no jeopardy here, obviously he turns up or there’d be no podcast. The guest is the fantastic UFOologist Michael Sheen.
The pair discuss why the best bit has been missed out of the new War of the Worlds, how Michael would get inside Richard, finding out you’re not in a film when you get to the premiere, the big questions raised by the film Passengers and whether its worth having a robot with no downstairs, a missed Pointless opportunity and an audacious quiz show plan and what motivated Sheen’s decision to reconnect with his childhood home of Port Talbot. It’s funny, interesting with a strong homoerotic charge. Plus they talk about Tron. What more do you want?
Rich has a terrible confession to make about this podcast, which somehow shocks and appals his audience, but there will be plenty more appalling stuff to come as he introduces the diabetic comedian, Ed Gamble.
Giddy from hunger, tiredness and having to behave properly for last week’s podcast, Rich is the drunkest he’s been in 2019 (even though he still hasn’t drunk a drop) and the podcast spirals in some unexpected and bizarre directions involving dabbling with pubic management, which five diseases should be cured by the Disease Genie, double diabetes, Biblical analysis and the signs of mental breakdown. Rich fancies a sleep halfway through, but bravely mainly continues to talk and to be honest, has little to no memory of what happened in the last twenty minutes, so that can be as much a surprise to him as it is to you.
RHLSTP rolls into Warwick Arts Centre, but is it really in lovely Warwick or horrible Coventry? And should a city that keeps breaking Cathedrals be allowed another one? Richard’s guest this week has got to the venue despite being man-handled at Coventry railway station, it’s the charming and handsome Herring lookalike, Bobby Mair.
They discuss some of Canada’s issues with the English language, Hitler’s shoe size, William Shatner’s wilderness years, whether vegetarians can have pets, whether comedians should marry comedians, whether it’s worse to have a roast battle with your wife or your ex comedy partner, having two dead mums and opening for Jerry Sadowitz. Is “offensive” comedy doomed to disappear or is it possible to weather the Twitter storms.
RHLSTP is back at the Warwick (Coventry) Arts Centre and Richard is discussing his daughter’s reaction to the Teletubbies and his son following in his footsteps. His guest is actor and temporary expert on ugly pets, Caroline Quentin.
They discuss the most terrifying children’s TV characters, being sacked for failing to dress priests, the wonder of Bernie Clifton, the strong women in Men Behaving Badly, why Caroline stopped doing Jonathan Creek and whether she’d return, what Richard will be buying her for her imminent birthday, why she’s worried about Martin Clunes touching her breast and what it’s like to be haunted by a ham-eating ghost. Plus Caroline sings her 1990s top 30 single beautifully, whilst Richard sings the theme to Dream Stuffings less beautifully.
RHLSTP comes to the Marlowe Theatre in Canterbury, a town divided by what should happen to the local takeaway shop, but with an audience smart enough to get a Thomas a Beckett joke. The guest this week is sometimes known as dopey Barry from Eastenders, but is actually the quiz champion smartypants Shaun Williamson.
They discuss how Shaun went from boozy postman via incompetent Navy recruit to getting more people watching his wedding than a royal. Plus how Shaun failed to convince as a woman, what happened when Ricky Gervais made the call about Extras, hiding in a cupboard from Mike Reid, working with Al Murray and did he slip or was he pushed?. Find out which of Shaun and Richard is the best at Pointless and Prince Andrew gets a couple of mentions.
RHLSTP returns to the Marlowe Theatre I’m Canterbury for the second week running and Rich is doing some of his topical material about St Augustine. His guest is the artist and musician Jim Moir aka Vic Reeves.
They talk about the unique delights of being managed by Malcolm Hardee, how to improve the number 2 Ultravox hit, Vienna, how Morrissey turned nasty, how Vic unmasked Jack the Ripper, the ghost of Freddie Mercury, how only really good double acts have a psychic connection, the impoliteness of looking like you're going to die and then not dying and how an episode of Big Night Out is made in half an hour. Plus the importance of creating laughter in comedy, what Michael Collins saw on the dark side of the moon and the horrifying spectacle of the Top of the Pops audience.
Rich is at the Cambridge Corn Exchange and has had a dream about eating lettuce with Blur and that’s pretty much the most exciting thing that’s happened to him this week. His guests are the most bizarre of things, a double act that like each other, Max and Ivan.
They chat about falling asleep whilst acting, organising stag dos, watching yourself toilet, the Spanish equivalent of the Tooth Fairy, what it’s like to be the youngest professional wrestler, Richard’s disappointment at not becoming the new leader of Isis and creating a homage to fifties radio comedy. Plus whilst people of different nations should not be allowed to breed - are we finally able to say that in our brave new world?
Their new show is called 'Max & Ivan: Fugitives' and can be found in all the usual places. Click here to open it in your native app https://podfollow.com/maxandivanfugit...
Richard is at the Brighton Theatre Royal and in danger of having a deadly secret revealed unless he stumps up the cash, but is it worth the price he has to pay? Never mind, he can forget all about it for now, as he chats with model turned presenter turned actor turned author turned therapist, Annabel Giles.
They discuss teenage rebellion, accidentally becoming a model, behind the scenes at Band Aid, saucy Lady Di, how Annabel managed top avoid a Gotcha, Brightonians on Penny Farthings, eating kangaroo anus, losing everything and battling on. Rich attempts to get some free therapy but is beyond help it seems.
Richard has returned to the Brighton Theatre Royal for the second consecutive week and is worried that he has let down a squirrel, but he has no time to ponder as his guest is juggler and writer of erotic fiction, Simon Evans.
They chat about finding magazines in the woods, how to make a living making juggling balls, whether future technology will allow us to travel into a virtual reality version of our past to have a second go at stuff and right wing comedy. Plus predictions about what will happen with Brexit made back in September. Were they right? And who has survived?
Richard is at the Haymarket Theatre in Leicester and his Yorkshire roots mean he isn’t going to let a bone of contention go. Luckily he has the fabulous Jenny Eclair on hand to take his mind off it.
They discuss lines of coke the length of a freezer, how Rich may be responsible for Jenny’s menopause, marrying for tax reasons, the sexiness of Mrs Thatcher, farting in front of your daughter’s boyfriend, the importance of hobbies and whether middle age brings madness. Plus Jenny’s fabulous book Inheritance https://www.amazon.co.uk/Inheritance-... and the challenges of doing an audio book.
A week has passed, the costume change proves it, but Richard is back at the Haymarket Theatre in Leicester and still fuming about the bones that he believes are rightfully his. Never mind, local resident and inexpert quizzer Grace Petrie is here to convince him that Leicester is actually all right, despite all evidence to the contrary.
They discuss how she accidentally became a protest singer, how it’s ultimately a good thing that her industry can’t box her up, the universality of teenage angst at school dances, the inspiring Hannah Gadsby, how social media is amazingly not the best place to have discussions about human rights and how to get around swearing on Radio 2.
Richard is back at the Bristol Old Vic and is just happy to be no longer in Leicester, but what is Bristol famous for? You’ll find out. His guest is legendary Bristol comedian Mark Olver.
He discusses how his dad failed to catch a bungee jumper, living with Bristol’s most famous comedians, his move into TV Warm Up and his favourite ever Pointless (non-) player, how he has to carry on performing through vomit, horses and injury, how his birthplace has nothing going for it apart from ice cream and how best to describe the low-point of Richard’s career. A brilliantly entertaining hour from one of Bristol’s most modest sons, with a lot of material that will appeal to people who live within the environs of the city and are particularly interested in the road works of September 2019.
Richard is back in Bristol and surprised at some of the refurb choices apparently made at the SS Great Britain. His guest is the gorgeous force of nature that is Jayde Adams.
They chat about the genius of Michael Barrymore, the world of competitive dance. officiating weddings in an inflatable church, Amazon Prime specials, finding comedy in tragedy, working class feminism, why it’s polite to your audience to try and do a good show and how comedians can still shock and surprise. It’s an extraordinary interview from a brilliant comedian in a city that has a lot to be proud about.
Rich has had his lactose tolerant choices mocked at the supermarket again, but he will rise above it as he comes to posh old Richmond Theatre to talk to Sam Wills aka Tape Face.
They discuss the bizarre world where a child stalked a clown, how to clip through a tennis racquet, the accidental discovery of the character and who thought it up, the gamble of going on a talent show and how it might have just paid off, living and working in Las Vegas, taking props through airport security and the controversy over the cloning of Tape Face. Plus the best kind of tape to use and instructions on how to apply it to your mouth. Richard realised his Boss Cat error after this recording, but to be fair the audience were given the chance to correct him and failed him, so it’s their fault.
Richard had so much fun at the Richmond Theatre that he’s come back again. Sure he’s wearing the same clothes, but a week has gone by and that’s plenty of time to do laundry and dry-cleaning. His guest this week is first series of RHLSTP hero Nick Frost.
They chat about Nick’s amazing, if rather sad autobiography https://www.amazon.co.uk/Truths-Half-... how his mother took on the boys who bullied Nick (and their mum), a night out with Quentin Tarantino, comeuppance for terrible aeroplane passengers, ghosts, acceptable positioning in a Human Centipede, sharing a single bed with Simon Pegg, punching walls, why Captain Pugwash the movie is unlikely to be made and making a tree famous. It’s a more serious chat than last time, with a remarkable and thoughtful guest who has been through more tragedy than you might have imagined.
We’re at the Winchester Theatre Royal and Rich is blaming the city for the loss of one of our greatest authors. His guest is the comedy Doogie Howser Ahir Shah.
They discuss how politics will have changed between the recording and broadcast of this podcast, the sexiness of evil, Percy Pigs as an antidote to terror, perpetually burning coffee shops, being accused of plagiarism by the UK’s grumpiest comedian, the possibility that Richard is Ahir’s dad and whether a violent uprising is the only hope for the Millennials. Plus the return of some old favourite emergency questions.
See Ahir on tour http://ahirshah.com/
Back to the Winchester Theatre Royal for the second week running and Richard is annoyed at his child’s teacher’s money-making schemes. His guest was also the final guest of the 2019 Edinburgh Fringe run where Richard tried to run the podcast into the ground (dare he do it again?) it’s John Kearns.
It’s a giddy and self-indulgent podcast where most of the material is deemed too shoddy or contentious for broadcast, but takes in a possible return for a much-loved comedy hero, the possible return of Top Coppers, the leap of faith required to follow your comedy path, tracing Raymond Briggs, disappointing children at the Science Museum and whether John will be getting a lift home. It’s weird, it’s wonderful and it feels like the birth of an amazing, awkward, intergenerational double act. If you enjoy it half as much as Richard seems to then you should have a good time.
Richard is a the Corn Exchange in Exeter, a town famous for the the most comical suicide bomb of all time. And Richard is talking religion with Biblical scholar, Professor Francesca Stavrakopoulou.
They try to ascertain who wrote the Bible, what `Jesus got up to in the bits that didn’t make it into the book, whether anyone in the Bible actually existed, whether gods have genitalia, if God was married, why Eve was Adam’s second wife, whether being a woman or an atheist is a bigger handicap for a Biblical scholar and why St Paul had the wrong idea about sex during the Apocalypse. Plus the logistics of Noah’s Ark and the craziest bits in the Bible.
Check out Francesca’s book “God: An Anatomy”, fully illustrated. Yup, even that bit.
Richard’s house is being haunted by a film star, but he’ll get over it. He’s back at the Exeter Corn Exchange and chatting to the man behind the most employable moustache in the UK, Mike Wozniak.
They discuss how many people is too many people for a sketch troupe, children failing to recognise their own parent on TV, the internal voice that attempts to destroy all comedians, why moving to Exeter is not the ideal stand-up career move, how Prevenge was made, local newsletters and sadistic teachers.
Rich is at the Newcastle Stand and mourns the possible end of Pizza Express but celebrates besting Piers Morgan. His guest is bricklayer turned comedian turned fillum star, Dave Johns.
Dave takes us on his remarkable journey from Byker to I, Daniel Blake and beyond sprinkling the show with brilliant anecdotes about his brushes with A listers. Hear how Ken Loach ruined Dave's donkey ride business, how he was tricked by Homer Simpson, how he captured Lee and Herring's jacuzzi discomfort, misused modesty pouches, how he ended up sharing chips with Cindy Crawford and his disastrous gig to cross dressers on a nuclear submarine.
A great lesson in how to stay down to earth when success comes knocking, from one of the most popular and most cheeky acts on the UK circuit.
Rich liked the Newcastle Stand so much last week, he's returned to talk about how squirrels ruined his day and to list the questionable achievements of the city. His guest is surrealist and former clown, Seymour Mace.
They discuss what God was thinking when he tested Job, stealing from a gold mine, appearing in a terrible non-zombie zombie film, that you're all want to see now, meeting Arthur Bostrom, the genius and kindness of Bernie Clifton, how being on stage can be the only place a comedian feels happy and how a severed cow can bring you love.
Richard is back at his spiritual home of the Leicester Square Theatre and has more news about what you shouldn't put up or on your genitalia. His guest is the most well-read man in comedy Robin Ince.
They talk mainly about his fabulous book 'I'm a Joke and So Are You'
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Im-Joke-Are-You-Comedians/dp/178649258X/ and where comedians get their crazy ideas from. They take in whether childhood trauma leads to a life in comedy, whether comedy calms or aggravates the voices in our heads, wanting to throw babies downstairs, the dangers of looking at the next person up and wishing for what they have and whether it's true that we can't say anything any more.
Richard is back at the Leicester Square Theatre and filling for time as nothing has happened to him in the week that has passed since last week's show. His guest is comedian and project manager Athena Kugblenu.
They chat about disposable nappies, inappropriate work emails, podcasting in your kitchen with your baby on your knee, how stereotypes about a continent the size of Africa do not hold up, whether indiscretions mean a left-leaning politician must resign, whether it's culturally appropriate for Richard to kiss his teeth and how stand up and podcasts can level the playing field. Plus some baby talk, just to annoy the people who don't like that.
Richard is back in York, this time at the Grand Opera House and he's come up with a plan to rescue the magic football bones of Richard III from the thieving Leicester-folk. His guest is York City's second most famous comedian supporter and food-poisoning victim, David Reed.
They talk about crap student impro, working with the Twirlywoos, living next door to your parents, why you shouldn't eat at *****, whether rescuing Jesus from the cross would be good or bad for the world, playing a nervous Peter Cook and how many Herring hands you could fit in one Walliams hand.
RHLSTP returns to the Grand Opera House, York for the second week running. York is the most haunted city in Europe and Richard finds out what percentage of his audience have seen a ghost. The answer might surprise you. His guest is footballing and eating legend, Jon Parkin.
They discuss the journeyman sportsman's slightly unconventional training routine, his writing off of a golf buggy (and almost a goalkeeper), shitting in a bath in Magaluf, missing out on starters, how to lie your way out of being late for training, how he became friends with Jilly Cooper, self-inflicted injuries, gambling problems, depression and where he goes next now his playing career is over and if there's any place for a bluff, proud, honest (except when he's not) old-fashioned Yorkshireman in today's game. Would he do anything differently if he had his time over? Would he f**k?
Buy Jon's book here - you won't regret it - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Feed-Beast-Pints-poles-belly/dp/1910335991
Richard is at the Liverpool Playhouse and is impressed by the bravest heckle put down ever attempted in this proud city (with the best sense of humour in the world). His guest is one of the many stars of a showbiz dynasty, Kate Robbins.
They discuss Eurovision sabotage, writing the theme tune to one of the most controversial TV shows of all time, meeting Cilla Black whilst dressed as Cilla Black, the rudeness of James Franco, creating Fergie's laugh, an awkward meeting with Michael Barrymore and the mysterious curse that befalls anyone who works with Kate.
Richard is back at the Liverpool Playhouse, making his annual proclamation to fight any University lecturer in the vicinity. His guest is screen-writer, author and Olympic ceremony writer, Frank Cottrell-Boyce, who may be the most charming and awe inspiring man who has ever lived and also seems to be obsessed with robots (pervert).
They chat about art theft, how to keep writing with seven kids, how big breaks can come by chance on coffee breaks, impressing priests in Cannes, the amazing destiny of every Duke of York, why the Amish hate buttons, the killer instinct that led to one of the greatest University Challenge performances of all time, writing one of the best loved (as well as one of the least loved) episodes of Doctor Who, plus the amazing story of how the Queen appeared in the opening ceremony of the Olympics and how the Scum nearly ruined the surprise.A truly illuminating and inspiring chat between one of the greatest writers in the UK and the winner of the Carnegie medal.
Richard is at the Oxford Playhouse and unsettled by the fact that it's 30 years since he left University and appeared on this stage in Month in the Country. His guest is environmental campaigner and journalist George Monbiot.
Is the world screwed? Or can we save it if we all pull together? Why did George deliberately get arrested? Can Extinction Rebellion make a difference? And how can we reform our electoral system? Plus how wolves can change the course of rivers, fortune tellers correctly predicting George's death (almost), being stung by massive hornets and how Thatcher smashed the BBC. An illuminating and terrifying interview.
Richard is back at the Oxford Playhouse and testing out his daughter's jokes. Is she funnier than him yet? Of course she is. His guest is British Quiz Champion, Paul Sinha.
In a honest and moving interview, Paul discusses the impact of the diagnosis of Parkinson's Disease has had and the turbulence that has inevitably brought and what comedy can be created from this situation. They also chat about his upcoming marriage, his quizzing triumph, the unpleasantness of tabloids and the weirdness of their afternoon quiz obsession, Taskmaster, quizzing and whether Richard will ever be on The Chase. And is that an upward or downward step from Celebrity Mastermind? Also Richard rolls out a very revealing Spice Girls based Emergency Question.
Richard is riding high from another magazine article lauding this podcast, but was the journalist right about the audience. If the maths teacher he picks is anything to go by then they are actually much worse. His guest is thoughtful ginger genius Tim Minchin.
They chat about how Tim is the tent poles of this podcast, the devastation of having his film cancelled four years into production, Rich pitches a predictable new musical and they discuss if there is any hope left for humanity. See Richard's attempts at skiing here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vfHuRDprFlY. Sadly motorboating exploits were never caught on camera. Check out Tim's new show, Upright.
Richard is giddy from doing too many podcasts in too short a time, but luckily his guest will bring him down to earth about how tough his life really is - it's the brilliant and wise Sara Pascoe.
They discuss audience members going on to be stars, the real way to enjoy Going for Gold, space-docking and whether portable fridges have a freezer, chimney-sweep genitalia and why men wolf-whistle and what they hope to gain from it. Lots of ace chat about empathy, evaluation and porn and being in a lift with Harry Potter. Plus Sara reveals a rumour about Rich that will surely rival the high-backed armchair.
Order Sara's excellent book here - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Sex-Power-Money-Sara-Pascoe/dp/0571335993
Richard is at the Manchester Podcast Festival and reveals a surprising bit of his father's Mancunian history. His guest is recipient of the British Empire Medal, Janice Connolly aka Barbara Nice.
They chat about playing tambourine in a punk band, being discovered by Peter Kay, Simon Cowell's sense of humour and how Janice is the original Fleabag. Plus her work in theatre and why Birmingham isn't that bad (at least compared to Stockport). And a staggering denouement that you might want to check out on video.
Richard is back at the Manchester Podcast Festival and rolling out a 20 year old joke about the Magic Bus. His guest this week is actor and comedian Bethany Black.
They discuss the no-man's land between regular and Celebrity chase, what it's like to be a huge fan of Doctor Who and getting to be on the show and witness two Time Lords in one Tardis, plus the motivations to become a stand up and how she was too poor to become bankrupt, how she managed to wrestle victory at the end of a terrible year and the smorgasbord of problems that Beth has to draw on for comedy, whether it's got easier or harder to be Trans and how discussing mental illness in her routines is a helpful thing for us all. It's an honest and heart-felt conversation, but will that stop the toilet obsessed trolls? Probably not.
Richard is trawling the two days since his last podcast record for stand up material and predictably it isn't gold. But the lack of it being gold, makes it gold. As always. His guest owes everything to her last RHLSTP appearance, it's the multi-talented Rachel Parris.
She reveals how all her impro shows are all very carefully scripted and chats about collusion with Debbie Magee, befriending Anna Kendrick on Twitter, the whirlwind year she has when her Mash Report pieces went super viral and whether her 6 weeks old marriage is holding together OK. Plus Richard pitches a new podcast based on regret and Rachel reveals how she was hit by anxiety in the wake of her momentous year. She also gamely defends Leicestershire even though she's not mentioned as a notable resident of her home town on wikipedia.
Richard is hoping he will find his way into the Guinness Book of Records, but Norris Macwhirter is not answering his calls. His guest is making a return visit to RHLSTP after 7 and a half years (but will his hair reveal his success?) - it's the amazing Charlie Brooker.
The conversation is predictably dark and disgusting incorporating Charlie's fury at a seven year old who makes an amazing living opening boxes, trying to introduce his kids to the Young Ones, what the best pinball machine is, whether having sex with your best friend via computer game is cheating, the complexity of writing a choose your own adventure TV show, being born with an umbilical cord around your neck and how you can kill sperm with urine. Plus the inevitability of nuclear war and whether all people over 45 need to die to save the world. It's good.
Richard is at the Cambridge Corn Exchange and starts with a joke he first did in this venue 25 years ago. His guest is standup and daughter of the former Deputy Prime Minister of Russia, Olga Koch.
They talk about St Petersburgh and (inevitably) Rasputin and his cock, having sex with a sea creature, making bad man seem slightly better via stand up, how Richard hopes his penis might survive him (again), a confectionery tribute to an ex, how Chelsea Clinton is probably getting more than she deserves, cutting up strap-ons with a paper slicer. The conversation keeps coming back to genitalia for some reason. I can't imagine what prompted it.
Richard chats with a secretive journalist in his audience before meeting his Boat Race foe, Konnie Huq.
They talk about drenched time capsules, small dishwashers, cat name scandals, how she landed a TV job whilst still at school, wrestling for the Olympic torch, chocolate flavoured gametes, Piers Morgan, the unlikelihood of a Blue Peter presenter marrying Britain's angriest man and what they argue about, writing for kids and settling Blockbuster scores and middle-aged forgetfulness.
Buy Konnie's fun kids' book here https://www.amazon.co.uk/Cookie-Most-Annoying-Boy-World/dp/1848128827/
Richard is at the Northampton Deco and amazed by the local news headlines and tourists' Lady Diana disappointments. His guest is Communard turned Communion-giver, the Reverend Richard Coles.
They discuss the terrifying streets of Northampton, the Bay City Rollers in a carpet shop, forgetting you had a speed boat, being the only priest to have tried non-recreational drugs, whether it's possible to be a better Christian than Jesus, the post-traumatic stress of HIV, what it's like when the Prime Minister votes for you and inspiring two fictional characters. Richard forgot to ask Richard if he'd ever seen a Holy Ghost and will never forgive himself.
Richard is still in Northampton and reveals how an appearance on RHLSTP can get you on to the front page of a national newspaper. His guest is a man who refused to have cosmetic surgery to get on TV, Steve Mcneil.
They discuss his nerd-fascinating book, Hey Listen - the history of video games and some of the surprising stages in the evolution of pinball and Pacman, the compromises required to get Go 8 Bit on to the telly, the genius of Goblin King Rob Sedgebeer, getting married at Bletchley Park, what the Hell Twitch is all about and whether it's a good idea to rescue Jesus. Plus a ghost story that will surely impress the lazy journalists at the Star.
Richard is at the huge Theatre Royal in Glasgow and it's the biggest crowd he's ever had at one of his gigs, but he nearly got in a fight on his way here and it's all his pretentious tour manager's fault. His guest is the fierce, outspoken and brilliant Fern Brady.
They chat about choosing inappropriate music for You've Been Framed, Shaun Ryder's dodgy veneers, why Fern got the nick name 'hippy' at school, why sexism is worse in the world of comedy than in the world of stripping and what happens if you cut the middle man out of a Human Centipede.
Richard is back at the Theatre Royal in Glasgow and don't worry that he forgets about the cool kids at the start - he remembers halfway through and he's here to mend this religiously divided city. His guest is the 'important' writer and pretend truck driver Brian Limmond aka Limmy.
They chat about how they might not have anything left to chat about, the fantastic autobiography "Surprisingly down to earth and very funny", feeling like you've missed a day at school, being called out for wiggling, the poetic beauty of Limmy's first walk and the inefficient masturbatory technique that Richard first employed, giving up booze instead of giving up life, stealing cars when high and what the Hell is going on his Twitch channel and if he'll ever do anything else ever again.
