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Private Notes
-Bin Laden Song: Osama bin Laden sings and dances his way in and out of Canada.
-Coach's Corner: Special guest Ron MacLean and Her Royal Majesty drop the gloves in Queen's Corner.
-Bush - Iraq Update: George W. Bush wants to bomb Iraq while daughter Jenna just wants to get bombed.
-Wendy Report: The Wendy Report examines John Manley's Monarchy comment, crop circles in England, Yassar Arafat, banned soft drinks in L.A. schools, shoe bomber Richard Reid, Solicitor General Lawrence MacAulay, same sex marriages in Alberta, Kyoto Accord and the world's funniest joke.
-Stanron: Stan's new company leaves shareholders, locked, stocked and over a barrel.
-From the Files of CSIS: CSIS agents flex and protect.
-Quebec Man At Bar With Ami: Beer buddies like Pope J-2-P-2 ‘cause he's A-O-K.
-Ebb & Flo - Drought: Cash strapped farmers sell celebrity vegetables.
-Ozzy News: Ozzy Osbourne bites the head off the headlines.
-Martha Stewart Living: Martha Stewart discovers insider trad
-Chicken Cannon News: Chicken Cannon News reports on Saddam Hussein re-election, TD bank CEO, Ontario government's fund for developmentally challenged groups, Chretien announces Canada war strategy, Jimmy Carter, French tanker gets bombed, Steven Spielberg, Prince Harry, Dr. Scholl's Toothpaste, Museum of Sex, Dr. Seuss theft and new bikini law.
-Wilson & MacAulay: Solicitor General Lawrence MacAulay tackles his troubles, one scandal at a time.
-Pizza Couple: Why frozen pizza tastes like takeout.
-Saddam's Mistress: Saddam Hussein's mistress kisses and tells all, and has the mole to prove it.
-Java Gab - Cable Bills: Java Joe gets his decaf low-fat mochaccino in a knot over his cable bill.
-The Chrétien & The Copps: Jean Chretien and Sheila Copps plan the PM's legacy.
-The New B.S.: Hip news anchors walk and talk, and stumble through the news. Topics covered – Queen's Jubilee, new Oxford dictionary words, NHL safety nets, British motorists, Popes chastity speech, Arnold S
-News From Away: Jimmy and Seamus O'Toole report on Liberals ethics package, Canadian wins Booker Prize, Laurence MacAulay, American sniper, Garth Drabinsky, North Korea builds nuclear bomb, Calgary Flames streaker, man sells body parts, Robin Williams entertains the troops, women gives birth do own granddaughter, Jetsgo, Russian McDonald's bombed, Ketchup Bandits, Rolling Stones, new Loblaws ventures and Preston Manning.
-Burgermeister at Immigration: The Burgermeister, Germany's number one children's entertainer, immigrates to Canada.
-Sister Lucille Part 1: Sister Lucille unleashes her opinionated whip at Solicitor General Laurence MaCaulay.
-Saddam & Weapons Inspector: Saddam Hussein welcomes a U.N. Inspector with open nuclear arms.
-Sister Lucille Part 2: Sister Lucille unleashes her opinionated whip at George W. Bush.
-Dylan & Springsteen: Bob Dylan & Bruce Springsteen's new CD captures rock's greatest mumblers.
-Kyoto Panel: A panel of environmentally challenged g
-Tim Horton's Commercial - Stubby: A Tim Horton's commercial reveals the secret behind flooding the ice.
-Chrétien's Vacation Commercial: Canada's newest vacation destination: Club Fed Grande-Mere.
-McDonald's Baby Bouchard: Lucien Bouchard demonstrates that he has a way with children.
-Stumpy Tom Sings The Inbred Song: Stumpy Tom is ""inbred and worry free.... just like the Royal family""
-Canoeing Beer Ad: Coureurs de bois paddle boat and peddle beer.
-Queen Speaks Out: Queen Elizabeth chronicles her family's history in her new book, ""Hot, Horny and Inbred"".
-Bob Dylan For mbanx: Canada's big banks hop on the boomer song bandwagon with Bob Dylan.
-Mike Applies To MENSA: Mike from Canmore applies to MENSA.
-Nation's Business: Manning: Preston Manning cruises into Stornoway for the Risky Business of Reform 'n Roll!
-Macintosh Marriage: A Scottish lad from the McIntosh clan discovers the wife he has chosen is incompatible.
-Chrétien Board Game: Jean Chretien's new board game – where ever square is ""Screw Paul Martin.""
-Local Report: A vain local news anchor and his co-host target the headlines and each other.
-Charlton Heston NRA: Charlton Heston takes a shot at explaining why guns are good.
-CNN Videophone: CNN's Aaron Brown discovers the videophone is all that its cracked up to be.
-Taffi - Racial Profiling: Taffi raps about racial profiling.
-Manley at the Bank: John Manley's bank plans encounter merger-interruptus.
-Donut Shop: Air Farce donut trio looks at Remembrance Day, U.S. mid-term elections, Rohinton Mistry, Americans want to fingerprint Canadians at the border, Pat Buchanan, Dame Edna, Winona Ryder and Toronto Dominion Bank.
-BBC Interviews Queen: The Queen explains why the butler did it.
-Cabbie: Dave the cabbie rants about Osama bin Laden, Ontario Hydro, Harry Potter, an invisible Iranian bank robber, Gordon Lightfoot, Celine Dion, Shania Twain, Colin Powell, and Martha Stewart.
-Winona Ryder: Shopping Channel: On the Winona Ryder Shopping Channel merchandise is a steal.
-Billy Two Willies: Television: Television surfing leaves Billy 2 Willies drowning in disappointment.
-U.S. Border Guards: U.S. border guards screen visitors along the U.S. – Canada border.
-Football Stadium Marriage Proposal: Popping the question ""plane"" style.
-Bush Skeet Shooting: President Bush's Iraq attack is one skeet short of a full load.
-The Fat Show: An image conscious talk show host chews the fat with a weight doctor.
-Kyoto Commercial: Anti-Kyoto forces state their case.
