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Private Notes
Opens with the pseudo-Egyptian and Roman "Cleopatra's procession" dance ensemble, including a surprise appearance by Jack Benny.
Featured parody sketches on how three Broadway composers might have written music on Baseball: "My Fair Umpire,"a sports satire of Lerner & Loewe's 'My Fair Lady' in which Higgins (Kaye) and Eliza (Powell) sing songs such as "The aim of the game is mainly to complain;" "Horsehide Story," a choreographed parody of Leonard Bernstein's 'West Side Story' set on the baseball diamond; and "Baseball Man," set to the tune of Meredith Wilson's 'Music Man.' Also, sketch "The Victim" about a first-time airline passenger(Kaye & Cooper). "The Bandstand" sketch about a cheap clup trio (Kaye, Cooper and Sam D'Andrea) trying to perform as well as impersonating another act on a revolving bandstand.
Musical numbers: Danny Kaye - Consider Yourself / Take Me Out to the Ballgame / (Russian song) May Ther
Features a musical revue that might have resulted had Shakespeare written Hamlet for television, including song & dance numbers by Hamlet (Ferrer) and Rosencrantz & Guildenstern (Kaye). Also, Tony Charmoli Dancers in a jazz number to march music with a swing influence. ""Gemini"" sketch about two astronauts in space and ""The German Officer"" sketch about a private being asked to impersonate a German general captured by British Intelligence (both sketches with Kaye, Ferrer and Henry Beckman).
Musical numbers: Kaye - Brotherhood of Man Kaye & Ferrer - To Be or Not To Be (in Hamlet sketch) Norvo & Quintet - Devil and the Deep (Blue Sea?) Kaye, Norvo Quintet & Mann Singers - Three Blind Mice
""Dancing Pagodas"" sketch about an Indian trio (Kaye, Knotts & Lawrence) who let their fingers 'do the talking'. ""The Diner"" sketch - a dramatic triangle between a meek diner owner (Knotts), his sultry and unsatisfied wife (Lawrence) and black leather trucker (Kaye) who is willing to murder to win her. ""Toothache"" sketch on a suffering dental patient whose rest is interrupted (Kaye & Knotts).
Musical numbers: Kaye - Together Wherever We Go / Turn Around (dedicated to his daughter) Lawrence - Fools Rush In (song & ballet) Joe & Eddie - They Call the Wind Maria Kaye, Joe & Eddie - I Laid Around
Parodies of three TV domestic comedies set in the U.S. - ""Father Knows Nothing,"" France - ""Father Knows Plenty"" and Japan - ""Osaka Hillbillies."" [also appearing Harvey Korman, Dino Natali]
Musical numbers: Kaye - S'posin' (song/soft shoe dance) / song medley bemoaning the switch from telephone exchanges to area codes, such as ""As I Walked Out on the Streets of 512"" Moore - Hard-Hearted Hannah (song/dance) Foy - Delightful is the Word (song/dance) Kaye, Moore & Foy - When the Song and Dance Man Came to Town (vaudeville song/dance)
Features Kaye and Kelly in a song & dance tribute to Kelly's dancing career on Broadway and in the movies, including Kelly's tap dance to Kaye's linguini recipe and closing with both dancers' versions of "Ballin' the Jack." Other dance numbers are Charmoli's legs-only choreography to "Days of Wine and Roses" and a quartet of girls engaging Kaye in playground-style dance while he sings "You Make Me Feel So Young." "Business Lunch" sketch about a distracting restaurant fashion show at an important business meeting (Kaye, Harvey Korman, Henry Beckman). "Beauty Expert" sketch about a visit with Viennese beauty entrepreneur Miss Schmeckenvasser on the fictional TV show 'Wonderful World of Women' (Kaye, Korman, Jackie Joseph, Myrna Ross).
Musical numbers: Lee - I Could Write a Book / By Myself Kaye & Lee - You'll Never Get Away Kaye & Clinger Sisters - Side By Side
""Cowboys of the World"" sketches parody Westerns - including the stereotypical villain, hero, sidekick and woman in need of rescue - set in the U.S. ""My Son the Gunslinger;"" Scotland ""Restless Kilts"" and Russia ""Frontier Cossack"" (with Kaye, Morris, Prowse, Korman and Jamie Farr). Also ""Dr. Yes"" parody of the James Bond film (Kaye, Prowse, Morris, Korman). Kaye discusses his memories of Scottish entertainer Sir Harry Lauder.
Musical numbers: Kaye - Breezin' Along with the Breeze / Will Ye No Come Back Again? Prowse - Love Makes the World Go 'round (with male dancers)
Levee Singers - I Got Plenty o' Nuttin' Kaye & Levee Singers - Everybody Clap Your Hands
[also appearing - Harvey Korman, Jamie Farr]
Musical numbers: Kaye - South Rampart Street Parade
Sommers - Where Are You? / When Your Lover Has Gone
Kaye & Sommers - Romeo and Juliet
Kaye & Clinger Sisters - The Story of Alice
Features Kaye, Jourdan & Dancers in two numbers - the song & dance ""Walk Right In"" and an opera parody that presents a game of football as a dance. Also Carl Ballantine's comedy magic act as 'The Great Ballantine.' Trio of sketches on the theme of jealosy as it might appear in movies from the U.S. - ""Dial J for Jealosy,"" Italy - ""Jealousy, Italian-style"" and Turkey - ""Quick Bernice, My Burnoose"" (with Kaye, Jourdan and Talbot).
Musical numbers: Kaye - Gypsy in My Soul Farrell - Danny Boy Kaye & Farrell - Birth of the Blues Kaye & Jourdan - Walk Right In Jourdan - Honey
Gwen Verdon & Dancers in a trio of dances set to nursery rhymes - ""Pop! Goes the Weasel,"" jazz version of ""Three Blind Mice"" and lullaby ballet. ""Comedy Tonight"" sketch about the attempts - through jestering and square, flamenco, ballet & vaudeville dance - of a band of strolling players who must help the Prince of a mythical kingdom remember how to laugh (Kaye, Verdon, Korman). ""The Drive-in"" sketch about a couple celebrating their anniversary with a newlywed couple at a drive-in restaurant (Kaye, Verdon, Don Penny, Zeme North, Joyce Jameson).
Musical numbers: Kaye - Alouette Kaye & Verdon - Two of a Kind / What Is a Woman (spoken by Kaye, danced by Verdon) Clinger Sisters - High Hopes Kaye & Clinger Sisters - I Get So Lonely
Features Nancy Walker and Kaye in three musical sketches: the comparison of a possible Old Globe Theatre production with the contemporary ""angry young man"" British theatrical approach, both on the subject of love (""Love - Then and Now""); a 'Cliché Light Opera Company' production with the last-minute substitution of chorus girl Walker for the star (""Magnolia Blossoms of 1932""); and a Svengali spoof where the great vocal teacher and hypnotist discovers his maid can sing - but only with her mop in hand (also appearing - Harvey Korman, Sig Rumann, Marni Nixon, Dodo Denney).
Musical Numbers: Kaye - When My Sugar Walks Down the Street / Gypsy in My Soul Jackson - Deep River / Just a Closer Walk with Thee
Danny welcomes his guests Glynis Johns, Jo Stafford and folk trio 'The Big 3' (Cass Elliott, Tim Rose and Jim Hendricks). Stafford performs several solo numbers and a duet with Danny. The Big 3 perform a song of their first album, "Rider". Danny performs a song-and-dance number with British actress Johns.
Danny stars with guest star Howard Morris in a spoof about Robin Hood and His Merry Men. He, Julie Newmar and the Tony Charmoli Dancers dance to "Simon Says".
In this Christmas-themed show, Danny welcomes as his guests Andy Williams, Dick Van Dyke and Mary Tyler Moore. Danny and Dick are featured in a song-and-dance number, "Putin' on the Ritz." The featured comedy skit has Van Dyke portraying a tough as nails prosecutor locking horns with a seedy defense attorney during a murder trail where both lawyers play to television cameras in the courtroom.
Danny welcomes guests Nat 'King' Cole, Mary Tyler Moore and the singing Clinger Sisters. Sketches include a parody of "The Student Prince" and another featuring Danny and Mary playing wealthy socialites.
Esquivel and His Mexican Group
(Juan Garcia Esquivel)
Highlights:
Esquivel and His Mexican Group perform a big "Lawrence of Arabia dance number.
Other songs include "Top Hat, White Tie and Tails", "Granada" and "Jalousie".
Jack West and Nita Talbot team up for a sketch as a barber and a manicurits in a lovers' quarrel.
Danny portrays Mme. Schmeckenvasser, a school teacher who conducts a Dingle Dangle TV School for kiddies.
Highlights:
Marilyn, Danny and Terry-Thomas perform "Tea For Two".
Terry-Thomas plays a stuffy Captain of an English liner and has served notice to a bumbling novice waiter played by Danny.
Danny and Terry-Thomas team up for a sketch, a satire on escapes from prisoner-of-war camps with the craziest escape plan ever invented.
*NOTE: This was the first American appearance of the Maori Dancers, 136 of them from New Zealand with authentic tribal garb and dances.
Danny is joined by singers Dorothy Collins, Marilyn Lovell and the Clinger Sisters, as well as actor Jackie Cooper. Danny and Jackie review a famous movie actor's career in one skit and Danny plays a marriage counselor whose assistance is hindered by the thick accent with which he gives it. The star's is featured in his song-and-dance number, "Hand Me Down My Walking Cane".
Rod Serling, Art Carney and folk duo Joe and Eddie join Danny's show this week. Danny is planning a surprise birthday party, but gets nothing but interference from an electrician played by Art. The featured skit is a parody of "The Twilight Zone" with Rod Serling providing the narration to the strange tale of a man who parachutes into a country ruled by a 400-year-old man.
In a sketch Danny plays an excited new father seeing his infant son for the first time in the maternity ward, Diahann
plays the nurse who shows him his new heir.
And in "I'll Cry Tamale" Danny plays the part of a Mexican hero.
Diahann sings "Johnny One Note" and "In Love, In Vain".
Diahann and Danny duet on some nonsense songs.
Danny does a solo dance pantomime illustrating the problem of a tipsy man paying his bill and leaving a saloon.
Harvey Korman and Danny appear in a comedy version of a late-night television show "The Hundred Dollar Movie".
*NOTE: Diahann Carroll was in the Broadway musical "No Strings".
Imogene & Danny do a comedy sketch based on a family game "Monopoly".
The dancers present a "Can Can" number.
Imogene & Danny team up for a song and dance impression of great show business combinations of the past.
Joe & Eddie sing "Kisses Sweeter Than Wine".
Harvey joins Danny & Imogene in the closing sketch titled "Der Fledermountie", another presentation of the Kaye
light opera company. The story concerns the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, a bearskin thief and a pretty Indian maiden.
Peter Falk
Clarinestist Pete Fountain
Michele Lee
Highlights:
Peter Falk plays Danny's paranoid roommate in a hospital in one skit.
In another skit Peter as Sheik Ben Khasee gives British secret agent Kaye a bad time.
Jazzman Pete Fountain and Danny Kaye do a rousing version of "When the Saints Go Marching In".
Michele Lee sings some Broadway tunes.
Danny backed by the show's dancers perform "Shine on Your Shoes".
Hayley joins Danny in an opening sketch in which Danny gives a hilarious portrayal of a father suddenly realizing his daughter is growing into maturity.
John Mills and Danny take the spotlight with a clever "Mutiny on the Bounty" satire.
Danny, John and Hayley team up for a sketch about a French customs inspector.
Joe and Eddie sing "The Ox Driver's Song".
Buddy and Danny do a light-hearted song-and-dance to "I Caught A Big Bear".
Back in character Buddy plays a hillbilly Pa (Jed Clunk) with two sons - Danny (as Jud, who went get a wife and came back with a ba'r instead) and Howard Morris (as Spud) with Harvey Korman as the folk song researcher who wants to preserve their rendition of "Mountain Stew".
Danny, Buddy and Howard perform "Marching Together".
Another skit has Danny as a party host, Harry Wittner and Howard Morris as the obnoxious guest he tries to get rid of by such devices as putting a turkey in a piano.
Danny sings "Hey, Look Me Over".
Marilyn & Danny duet with "Mommy, I Wanna Drink of Water".
Art returns for his third guest appearance the Maori Dancers make their second appearance on the show.
In the opening sketch, Art portrays a prospective son-in-law who makes his marriage pitch to the girl's father, (Danny).
Art portrays Big Mike, a tough con planning a prison break, Harvey Korman plays the Prison Warden and Danny the prisoner who's been in solitary for 11 years.
Danny & Art team up for a song-and-dance number.
Diahann Carroll returns for her second visit.
Danny starts off the show with a modernized "Old MacDonald".
Danny & Diahann duet on "Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah".
Danny & Diahann, cast members and the Tony Charmoli dancers pay tribute to the clocks in our everyday lives in a comedy-song production number titled "The Clock".
Danny plays an interpreter at a banquet translating the French and English of two men who get along until they start comparing grandson pictures.
A little boy's first haircut is another comedy sketch..
Danny & Nancy play a poor London couple (Rudy & Agnes) in a sketch.
Joe and Eddie perform "The Surfers".
The Kinderspiel Light Opera Company presents "Sheiks in Toyland" with Danny playing a terrible sheik and Nancy a French captive woman.
Stiller and Meara play a bickering couple recovering from the after effects of a party.
Tony sings "When Joanna Loved Me" and "It's a Sin to Tell a Lie".
Danny & Tony duet with a Blues medley.
Tony Charmoli's dancers and Earl Brown's singers are featured in a production number titled "The Music Stopped".
Danny and Howard cut up in two sketches. There's a British spy case, a take-off on James Bond, Danny plays James Blonde to Howard's Dr. Yes.
In an Italian village postman Vittorio Scampi (Howard) reads a letter to an old tailor, Giovanni (Danny) who cannot read the letter from his son in America, giving him a chance to put his idea of Italian on display.
Danny sings "Gigi".
Danny portrays the part of a wallflower whose friend persuades him to attend a lonely hearts dance.
Danny plays a skillful matador in a sketch.
Danny & Laurie perform "Change Partners".
Danny Kaye and Bea Benaderet do a comedy sketch set in the Deep South titled "The Long, Hot Supper". Jim Nabors plays the weak son of Fat Daddy (Kaye), a ruthless tyrant. Bea plays Fat Daddy's wife, a 'genteel' woman who lives in the past. Andy makes a brief appearance in the sketch.
Jim Nabors sings "I Ain't Down Yet".
All join in a song for the finale.
Mary plays Queen of the Jungle in one sketch with Danny
Mary plays an Irish colleen whose pub-owner father (Harvey Korman) feels that no man in Ireland is good enough for his daughter, even wandering folk singer Danny who is unlucky enough to capture her heart.
Shari and her puppet Lambchop sing a French favorite with Danny.
In a skit Vincent, an art collector and critic explains art to Danny who has stopped into the gallery only to get out of the rain.
Danny, Howard & Vincent do a sketch about a fancy restaurant with Vincent playing the snotty Maitre'd and Danny as the pain-in-the-neck customer.
*NOTE: Danny Kaye had badly burned his foot last week and did not appear in a few of the skits.
For the season finale, Danny has comedienne Pat Carroll and pianists Ferrante and Teicher as guests. In three short skits, Pat and Danny demonstrate the different reactions anticipated if a wife wrecks the family car in France, Germany and Italy. Danny and Pat do another sketch where Danny plays a male nurse to Pat's wealthy hypochondriac patient in a hospital.
Ferrante and Teicher perform "Brazil".
*NOTE: Pat Carroll, musical/comedy actress, including a memorable appearance as one of the wicked stepsisters in the Lesley Ann Warren version of Rodgers and Hammerstein's “Cinderella” TV special in 1964. She is now a respected dramatic stage actress, winning raves for her one-woman show about Gertrude Stein.
