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Private Notes
Sylvester wakes up in the bed of a woman who is not his wife, unable to remember how he got there. When he tries to leave, his mystery mistress stops him at the door saying her husband is coming up the stairs about to catch them both. Unfortunately, the pair is stuck in a fifth floor apartment so Sylvester has to hide in the closet to avoid the confrontation.
Sylvester emerges from the closet with his gun raised to defend himself as Rufus loses his temper. As it turns out, he’s actually a pastor and has a secret to reveal. He makes a phone call that make both Sylvester and the pastor’s wife very nervous, inviting someone he calls “baby” to come upstairs. Sylvester continues to wave his gun around as he gets more anxious, but there’s a knock on the door and both he and the wife are shocked to find out who his lover is.
Pastor Rufus explains that he has been sneaking around with Chuck, the mystery man from the phone call. He tells his wife Cathy that she has no right to judge him since she’s been shacking up with guys at the club. Chuck interrupts to say that he and Rufus are in love. Rufus adds that they plan to get married. Meanwhile, Sylvester is getting so frustrated having to listen to this story that he shoots a bullet into the air to get them all to stop yelling and calls his house to say he’s coming home – but a man answers the phone.
Sylvester starts speeding home to catch his Gwendolyn in the act, but gets delayed by a police officer busting him for doing 60 in a 40 mph. After taking his ticket, he continues home and rushes upstairs to find his wife in the shower. He wastes no time in confronting her about the man on the phone and she reminds him that her brother Twan came home that day. Sylvester makes it up to her with crazy sex, but stops when he discovers an open condom under the covers.
Sylvester and his wife Gwendolyn get into a full-blown argument. He starts waving his gun around again as she tells him she was at the club last night as well and saw him go home with Cathy. He threatens her again until she tells him the name of the guy she slept with. Turns out her girl Roxanne knows Chuck and Rufus, and it’s Rufus’s wife Cathy that introduced Gwen to the police officer that stopped him on the way home.
Sylvester and his wife, Gwendolyn, end up laughing at the irony of the situation on their bedroom floor. Meanwhile, James, the police officer who stopped Sly and slept with Gwen, comes back to the house out of concern. When he finds the back door broken in and mistakes the sound of their laughter for crying, James pulls a gun on Sylvester. Another argument breaks out and Sylvester ends up accidentally shooting Gwen’s brother Twan – who just returned home from prison.
Gwen, Sylvester and James begin to freak out and place blame over who shot Twan, but luckily it was only a flesh wound and Twan is able to patch himself up quickly in the bathroom. There’s a knock at the door that puts everyone on edge since they are expecting more ridiculous drama, but it’s only Rosie the nosy neighbor who came to see what was going on when she heard gunshots.
Officer James heads home to his country bumpkin wife Bridget, relieved for the drama to be over. When he arrives at the house he finds that she’s acting really strange and confronts her. Bridget tries to change the subject to ease his fears but little does James know that she has a lover of her own hiding somewhere in the house.
James continues his interrogation of Bridget who can’t get him off the trail. He not only finds another man hiding in his kitchen cabinet, but that the man is a little person.
James promptly attacks the little person – named Big Man – for sleeping with his wife. Bridget runs upstairs and calls a number she gets from her purse – which turns out to be Gwen. Bridget lies and says she found the number in her husband’s pocket and needs Gwen to come over quickly to calm him down. Meanwhile the Big Man is trying to explain to James that he was paid to sleep with his wife by a mystery man that would kill him for telling. Bridget returns downstairs with a shotgun to try and save Big Man, only to be interrupted by Sylvester and Twan breaking in to try and calm the situation down.
The guns are out again and everyone is threatening to shoot each other. James mistakenly refers to Sylvester and Twan as Chuck and Rufus, which starts Sylvester on an interrogation of his own over how the police officer knows the two gay lovers. In the excitement, Bridget starts to get sick and we learn that she’s three months pregnant – with Big Man’s baby.
The saga heads back to Cathy and Rufus’s apartment to show what’s been happening since Sylvester ran out to check on Gwen. The triangle continues to argue until the phone rings and Cathy answers. It’s Gwen, explaining the story of everything that had happened since the night before, including catching Sylvester leaving the club with “some crusty wig-wearing ho,” who Cathy reluctantly reveals was her.
