3x08 The Wellness Center

[8.6/10] What a blast this was! For one thing, the comedy was on point. The very concept of Nandor joining a group that’s half “Vamps can be human again!” cult and half step aerobic workout club is hilarious. The montage of Nandor having a blast with his weirdo jazzercise buddies, all set to them singing “One Week” by Barenaked Ladies absolutely tore the house down. Cree Summer (who I’d never seen in live action before, despite her voicing many of my childhood favorites), absolutely killed it. Pretty much everything about the Wellness Center brought the laughs, with the right lighting and costuming choices to make it feel cheery and creepy at the same time.

Back at the house, there were a lot of good comic bits too. The random sequence where the vamps inquire about Guillermo’s “pee pee” was an amusing bit of vaudevillian patter. Colin Robinson farting all over Nandor’s stuff didn’t get much of a chuckle out of me, but him getting way too into belly dancing certainly did! And we even got a callback to creepy/crepe paper!

The horror and action were good too! It’s been a while since we’ve gotten a nice Guillermo vamp-fighting spree. The minimal cuts as he threw down with the aerobic cult members made for some thrilling combat. I particularly like the creativity of him fighting one vamp with a hula hoop, and cutting to the mirror to emphasize what’s happening despite the fact that we can’t see the vampire. It’s even nicely set up in the earlier montage! Plus, the crazy eyes and awkward pointing of the aerobics cult were nicely unnerving.

And yet, on top of all of that, I most enjoyed the human moments (if you’ll pardon the expression) in this one. Nandor suffering from depression was surprisingly sympathetic. It’s What We Do in the Shadows, so things are a little exaggerated, but there’s still something relatable about him hitting another milestone and feeling a bit rudderless. It makes for good motivation behind his choice to leave the house and join the Wellness Center, as a chance for the big change and electric shock he feels his life needs.

Of course, the impact on Guillermo is just as moving. We’ve reached the point where it’s clear that Guillermo loves his master, and this episode plays up his feelings in the guise of an ex who’s desperate to run into their former partner. It’s sad and sweet, while still being low-key funny, which is the space where the best Guillermo stories live.

Not for nothing, his scene on the front steps with Nandor may be my favorite in all of What We Do in the Shadows. He doesn’t want to lose Nandor, and at the same time, he wants to be turned, so that all of this service can mean something. And I love the twist here. Nandor doesn’t give him the bite, of course, but he gives Guillermo something more valuable -- his affections.

Maybe it’s just the depression talking, but Nandor’s come to think of vampirism as a curse, and he cares enough about Guillermo not to want him to have to shoulder that burden. Distinct from past instances in which Nandor just seemed to want to hang onto a good servant, this version of him is willing to release Guillermo from his ghastly vocation, and yet still doesn’t want to turn his would-be protege, because he doesn’t want Guillermo to suffer like he is. There’s something unbearably touching about that, and it gives the show a way to maintain their relationship while taking away the uncomfortable part of their dynamic we saw earlier in the series.

Last but not least, I’m intrigued at where this episode leaves things. Guillermo rightfully thinks that his friend has been brainwashed. His judgment’s probably clouded by not wanting to lose Nandor, but at the same time, Jen the Wellness leader is plainly running a scam or certainly something full of nonsense, so it’s not crazy for Guillermo to think the man he loves has fallen under the spell of a charlatan.

At the same time, Nandor argues that whatever the cause, he’s genuinely happy for the first time in decades. That’s worth something too. Maybe it’s not sustainable if it’s built on a lie. (Especially considering what Jen does with the rest of her followers in the stinger.) But it matters, and Nandor’s friends’ unwillingness to countenance that portends interesting things.

Overall, this is a big deal episode of the show, which features great comedy, great comedy, and best of all, great beats for the characters as their relationship continues to evolve and grow more complicated. I didn’t expect such affecting character writing from such a loopy show, but What We Do in the Shadows continues to surprise me.