Review by Jean van Kasteel

Day of the Dead: Bloodline 2017

Oh wow, that was terrible. With that title, it started off badly, but I like zombies so why not.

It's a female doctor being raped by Max, when suddenly a cadaver gets back to life and bites Max in the neck. Five years late, the doctor is working at a military facility/refugee camp. The chief there is always giving terrible orders and being a meanie to everyone, and of course one day a little girl gets sick so they have to go to the hospital where the doctor was practicing pre-zombie to get meds. And there, they meet Max again. But zombie Max.

Max follows them to the facility, because he's still obsessed with the doctor (and he's very agile, smart, because fu probably). He gets into the facility and eats people while searching for the doctor. When both of them finally meet again, there's a plot twist: Max the rapist zombie shows his arm, with "ZOE" written in the flesh (it's the name of the doctor btw). Then Max gets captured, and he HAS to stay alive because in his blood there is probably something to make a vaccine. Sadly, he escapes after stealing the keys from his cell by acting like a regular zombie and pretending to eat people (which he normally does but not this time, this time he's faking it to get the keys). Aaaaanyway, he escapes and saves the sick little girl (who's better now) from another regular zombie, because he wants to use the girl as a bargaining token to make Zoe love him or something like that.

The chief then dies, like, stupidly. He gets bitten by a regular zombie and BAM, he's dead. It adds nothing, it serves no purpose, he dies because he's a douche I believe. Except that Zoe the doctor uses that time to escape from Max the rapist zombie, and she hides in a puddle of poop. Ah yes, because Max can talk (we learn that in the last 20min of the movie, btw, after an hour spent with him) and he can also smell like a god. So she hides in poop with a machete and she kills Max. No vaccine then, right? Haha, you'd be wrong, because apparently the writers decided that the vaccine could be made after all and Zoe the doctor saves everyone with her vaccine.

There you go. It was terrible: badly written, bad acting, badly made. 2/10 (Netflix recommends it at 84%, but don't fall for it, it's trash)

loading replies
Loading...