I wish I had put my foot down and immediately left (exited the relationship) when I discovered that I was being cheated on. I originally intended to, but as with many experiences, my situation was different from hers; including the fact that I actually discovered the infidelity unexpectedly myself rather than it being willingly admitted to me.
The details Ivan gave didn’t matter. It didn’t matter that the lady he slept with was lonely or depressed, or even if she’d literally been about to off herself. It didn’t matter that he had no romantic feelings towards her. It didn’t matter that he described her as unattractive to him. It didn’t matter that it was cold that night. It didn’t matter that there was wine involved (he chose to drink with this other person, alone.) It most certainly didn’t matter that it was only one single time in a double digit number of years that he slept with another woman that wasn’t his wife.
For fuck’s sake, this isn’t the sort of thing anyone should expect marvel or commendation for. Let’s not give accolades to anyone for being less of a bad person than they could have been. All that mattered is that it did happen, even just the one single time.
“The difference between once and never is the whole world.”
He didn’t win back any points for “doing the right thing” by going to be there for this other woman and their child. Because the fact still remained. He cheated.
He was giving excuses, but he had none. He wasn’t drugged. He wasn’t raped. He didn’t drink so much that he temporarily forgot he had a wife that he’d committed to solely being with. It’s not like he bedded this other woman without a single thought ever going through his head about his significant other, and then later was like, “Whoops! That’s right, I’m in a monogamous relationship with my wife of 15 years. Silly me!” It was a conscious choice, through and through.
He deserved every bit of everything falling apart on him. He sure as hell didn’t deserve a second chance with Katrina. No one who chooses to take that path does; not with the person they chose to cheat on. Once that’s fucked, it’s fucked. There’s no going back. Some people do work it out, but that’s some sort of miracle.
If the other woman hadn’t gotten pregnant would he have ever revealed to his wife what he’d done? Or would he have just continued onward with a “what she doesn’t know can’t hurt her” attitude? That’s the kind of shit that haunts me to think about when it comes to risking yourself in relationships.
Review by Bunny HarvestmanBlockedParent2022-02-11T20:02:26Z
Kudos to Katrina.
I wish I had put my foot down and immediately left (exited the relationship) when I discovered that I was being cheated on. I originally intended to, but as with many experiences, my situation was different from hers; including the fact that I actually discovered the infidelity unexpectedly myself rather than it being willingly admitted to me.
The details Ivan gave didn’t matter. It didn’t matter that the lady he slept with was lonely or depressed, or even if she’d literally been about to off herself. It didn’t matter that he had no romantic feelings towards her. It didn’t matter that he described her as unattractive to him. It didn’t matter that it was cold that night. It didn’t matter that there was wine involved (he chose to drink with this other person, alone.) It most certainly didn’t matter that it was only one single time in a double digit number of years that he slept with another woman that wasn’t his wife.
For fuck’s sake, this isn’t the sort of thing anyone should expect marvel or commendation for. Let’s not give accolades to anyone for being less of a bad person than they could have been. All that mattered is that it did happen, even just the one single time.
“The difference between once and never is the whole world.”
He didn’t win back any points for “doing the right thing” by going to be there for this other woman and their child. Because the fact still remained. He cheated.
He was giving excuses, but he had none. He wasn’t drugged. He wasn’t raped. He didn’t drink so much that he temporarily forgot he had a wife that he’d committed to solely being with. It’s not like he bedded this other woman without a single thought ever going through his head about his significant other, and then later was like, “Whoops! That’s right, I’m in a monogamous relationship with my wife of 15 years. Silly me!” It was a conscious choice, through and through.
He deserved every bit of everything falling apart on him. He sure as hell didn’t deserve a second chance with Katrina. No one who chooses to take that path does; not with the person they chose to cheat on. Once that’s fucked, it’s fucked. There’s no going back. Some people do work it out, but that’s some sort of miracle.
If the other woman hadn’t gotten pregnant would he have ever revealed to his wife what he’d done? Or would he have just continued onward with a “what she doesn’t know can’t hurt her” attitude? That’s the kind of shit that haunts me to think about when it comes to risking yourself in relationships.