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Private Notes
Max, 25, has already undergone 'top surgery': a double mastectomy and male chest sculpting. He is hoping to become Britain's first transgender Rabbi. Former policeman Karen, 52, is preparing for full gender affirmation surgery. Drew, 22, is stuck living at home, and desperate to lead a 'normal' life in a world that constantly asks 'Is that a boy or a girl?' Lewis, 22, is looking to raise money for a double mastectomy and is investigating a phalloplasty (penis construction) - the surgeries he wants to make him feel fully male. Fox, 30, has only been transitioning for six months, and struggles daily to overcome his feminine looks. Donna, 25, is content living between genders, but navigating relationships can be hard. Sarah, 28, has just begun to live full-time as a woman and is building up the courage to tell her parents that she has changed her life forever. The decision to change gender can leave many trans people profoundly isolated, and this group of seven is no different. Though some derive enormous strength from family and friends, others can find themselves cut off, and many struggle to find work. Now they are coming together to share advice and support, reflecting a growing online community where many hundreds of transgender people have been making contact with one another. By physically coming together, the group develops genuine friendships and gives themselves the strength to overcome some of the multiple challenges of being trans in day-to-day life.
In the first programme, the group met and shared their experiences of what it's like to be transgender. Now they're back at home and applying what they've learned from each other in their everyday lives. Sarah faces one of the landmarks faced by every transgender person: telling her family that she intends to spend the rest of her life as a woman. She's tried before and lacked the courage to go through with it because she fears they may disown her. Now with the support of her friends, she's resolved to go through with it. Lewis came out as a man three years ago. Taking the male hormone testosterone has had massive effects - he's got a beard, a lower voice and body hair - but he's still got female breasts and genitals. He wants to find out about the surgery that's available - even after he finds out that the NHS has turned down his application for funding. And getting information about surgery is difficult, so Lewis is looking forward to the second retreat to see the results that both top and lower surgery can give him. Drew's still stuck at home; since her male to female transition five years ago, she's barely gone out without her mum. Not only does she lack friends, but she also lacks a career and without that she won't be able to afford the boob job she needs. At the moment, her cleavage is achieved with the help of four bras and 'chicken fillets'. The trouble is that, as a transgender woman, every time she applies for a job she's turned down. Will Sarah be able to tell her mum that she's found true happiness as a woman? What will Lewis be able to find out about surgery, and will Drew be able to convince an employer to give her a job?
The group re-convene at the retreat to work together to build the confidence they need to tackle the challenges they face in daily life. Lewis came out as a man three years ago, and taking the male hormone testosterone has had massive effects - he's got a beard, a lower voice and body hair - but he's still got female breasts. When Lewis applied for a mastectomy on the NHS, he was turned down on the grounds at it would be cosmetic. He is now determined to raise the £5000 he needs to get it done privately. As he goes about setting up a fund raiser, it becomes the opportunity he's been waiting for to reconnect with his father, who's struggled to come to terms with 'losing his daughter'. Meanwhile Drew starts the third retreat believing that she'll never be able to live a normal life. She's been rejected by potential employers fearing their customers' reactions to her trans status, but just as they're preparing to leave the retreat, she gets the chance she's been hoping for: work experience at a local coffee shop. It's up to her to prove she can put a sceptical public at ease, and work like any other girl.
Sarah, the most recently transitioned woman amongst the group, has to find a place to live. She moved from her home in Jersey to Swansea two months ago so that she could live full-time as a woman. So far, being at the retreat has given her hope: she's got six friends to call on for support, she looks and feels better, and has taken the enormous step of coming out to her mum. Now she wants to move again and make a new life in liberal, free-thinking Brighton. But can she find flat mates who will allow her to move in? At the retreat, everyone's talking and thinking about relationships. Fifty-two-year old Karen is still recovering from genital surgery where her penis was inverted to create the vagina she's always wanted. Previously she's always preferred women, but now she's started to see a man, and that gets the group thinking about the difficulties of dating. At 26, Donna's a beautiful transwoman, and single. Now she's determined to find the perfect man. On the last day of the retreat, the group invite their parents and friends to the house to celebrate a remarkable summer. What have they learned from each other? They all make speeches in the emotional highpoint of the series.
