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Private Notes
Unaired Pilot with Josh Radnor.
Jamie poses as an obnoxious guest star on Off Centre, intending all along to ""X"" the show's star, Sean Maguire. The tables get turned, however, when Sean recognizes Jamie from a JKX promo--and proceeds to ""X"" him! Sean not only ""X-ed"" Jamie--the first time Jamie ever got ""X-ed""--but he ""X-ed"" his co-stars as well, who were all in on Jamie's prank and didn't know that Sean had figured Jamie out!
Neurotic Everyman Mike is baffled by the amazing success enjoyed by hyperconfident womanizer Euan. In the opener, the polar-opposite pals move into a posh New York City apartment building complete with celebrities, including rather uptight rapper Status Quo and supermodel Vee, whose bodily functions eclipse her beauty. All is well in the new digs until Euan invites Mike's girlfriend, Liz, to move in with them.
When Mike and then Liz contract a certain sexually transmitted condition, Mike blames the assumed originator Euan. The irritating malady hampers both Mike and Liz's anniversary dinner and Euan's date with a friend from college.
Liza finds out about Mike's stash of adult videos and is surprisingly okay with it and even offers to watch some with him. But the sexy adventure in cinema turns out to be a bit of a let-down for Mike. Euan, meanwhile, endeavors to impress his incredibly jaded girlfriend.
On a night out with Chau and Euan, Mike repeatedly rejects women in favor of being faithful to Liz, who ends up kissing an old flame during the same evening. Chau gets angry at Euan for constantly stealing prospective dates.
Euan's quest to find a steady girlfriend lands him Ginger, an artist who Mike believes is taking Euan for all he's worth. Meanwhile, Liz proves to Mike that her revealing clothing makes him uncomfortable.
When Liz and her wild, flirty friend stay at the apartment for the weekend, Mike hopes for a ménage à trois. Euan, who has resolved to remain celibate with his current girlfriend, serves as Mike's mentor.
Mike's strange parents visit, allowing Mike to finally bond with his erstwhile, emotionally distant father. Unfortunately, Euan finds Mr. Platt in a compromising position with another woman.
Finding it difficult to keep up with the incredibly successful Euan, Mike tries to solve his money woes by taking on a second job at Chau's restaurant. Euan offers to help, but Mike refuses any more financial aid from his roommate.
After a co-worker spreads a rumor that he's gay, Euan is troubled upon learning that people don't have a hard time believing it. Mike, meanwhile, is overjoyed upon meeting Liz's unexpectedly unimpressive ex-boyfriend.
After Mike learns of Liz's wild past, he decides to make up for lost time by doing the crazy things he missed out on when he was younger.
In dire need of a job he actually enjoys, Mike seeks advice from a decidedly unreliable career counselor. Euan, meanwhile, concentrates his efforts on trying to win over their new neighbor, a B-movie actress.
Mike's increasing comfort level with Liz leads him to engage in behavior she doesn't entirely welcome. Meanwhile, Euan resolves to avoid a woman who routinely shows up in his life to break his heart; and Status Quo works on new song lyrics with Chau.
Sick of living with Euan, Mike decides to stay at Lauren's for a while. As revenge, Eaun invites Chau to live in Mike's room. The unlikely duo get along well, until Chau's behavior gets out of hand.
After Mike and Euan point out that his ""posse"" is a bunch of yes-men, Status Quo fires them and invites his neighbors to hang with him. Unfortunately, he treats Euan more like a slave than a friend.
In order to get women to notice them more, Chau and Euan pretend to be in a rock band; Mike irks Liz when he drunkenly proposes marriage and then forgets all about it.
Mike and Chau start going to a gym where a lot of nude men hang out; Euan dates Liz's deaf friend, who turns out to be less friendly than anyone realizes.
Mike tells Euan to stay away from an attractive visiting friend, explaining that she is his ""backup girl,"" should things not work out with Liz. Meanwhile, Chau pulls out all the stops to try to win a contest for a big-screen TV.
Liz sets Chau up with her equally bizarre roommate, creating a romance more ridiculous than anyone could have imagined. Meanwhile, Euan lies about his age in order to date 45-year-old woman.
Chau's new girlfriend is a hazard to his health---she keeps getting him beaten up by strangers. Meanwhile, irresponsible dog-sitters Mike, Euan and Liz watch Status Quo's treasured canine.
Mike and Chau mock Euan because he has a foreskin. This prompts Euan to consult a urologist, Dr. Barry Wasserman, who has a bizarre sense of penis humor, for circumcision.
Euan gets sucked into the drama of MTV's ""The Real World"" when he hooks up with a insipid cast member and fears she will bad mouth him to millions of women if he dumps her, so he schemes to have Chau steal her instead. Meanwhile, Mike lands his dream job doing sound for porn movies, but things turn dicey when he thinks Liz is hooking up with Status while he works nights, and the movies turn to guy-on-guy.
Mike feels that his relationship with Liz has gotten stale, so he decides it's time to break up and is not prepared when she beats him to the punch, however the break-up sex is so good that Mike does everything in his power to string the relationship along. When Euan meets a woman who is even wilder in bed than he is, he soon learns that even he has limits. Chau rallies to save a canceled TV series.
Euan and Status Quo meet a gorgeous woman in a bar and compete for her attention. When they realize that she has a twin, their competition escalates to see who can bed them both. Meanwhile, Mike realizes that the only way he can earn extra money to purchase an extravagant birthday gift for Liz is to bet on cockfights with Chau.
Mike impresses the guys when he leaves the bar with the new building tenant, Carmen Electra, however, back at her apartment, Mike's new diet causes him to clog her toilet. Undetected by Carmen, Mike enlists the help of his good friends Euan and Chau to help clear the blockage.
Mike and Euan's dorky urologist, Dr. Barry Wasserman, moves into their apartment building. The guys worry about the weird M.D.'s interest in being their buddy, until they discover he attracts women.
When Euan's date, Lindsey, announces to everyone that she wants Euan to deflower her when she turns 18 at midnight, Euan, Mike, Chau, Status and Liz flashback to their own first sexual encounters.
Mike's dorky friends from high school come to visit, making Euan feel like the not-so-odd man out. Meanwhile, Status makes a date with Liz.
In a competition to prove whether it's simply Euan's English intonation that attracts all the women, Mike and Euan switch accents. Meanwhile, Chau dates a homeless woman who is not entirely sane.
