Firstly I absolutely LOVED writing this - only because of the person who came on here to complain these little ditties were too long. I am going to use the word count in full every time from now on. It made me laugh so much. I mean who cares what I write?!
First Man, The First (TV), Interstellar, even Moon and dropping back further Solaris, The Right Stuff these and many more are the extended and distant family of Ad Astra. Unfortunately when your family is as interesting and as compelling as these movies then you are already standing in some particularly big and dark shadows and there needs to be a lot in you to get out into the light.
Ad Astra tries hard, it really tries hard. After all it has Brad Pitt and Tommy Lee Jones, although he now looks craggy enough to be a bonafide cliff face and throws in Donald Sutherland as the world’s oldest security detail plus a fleeting Liv Tyler because, well because it can I think?
With the unlimited potential of near-future space-travel and indeed colonisation at their feet the director/writers came up with a singularly strange and somehow uninvolving tale. Pitt is just a future Neil Armstrong, so dedicated, so single-minded, he bombs his wife out and then has to go on a frankly unlikely and long-winded trip/adventure to see his long-lost and feared dead father.
I’m not a science expert I was more on the art side of the coin at school so I do not profess to know the ins and outs of space travel and the mathematics and the physics involved but saying this even I could see the silliness inherent in the story.
Visuals of the huge antenna on the edge of space over the Earth was great, the terrible power surge and the ultimate investigation into it was the high point. From then on the trip was downhill. Much like Harrison Ford in the first cinematic outing of Blade Runner I was not a fan of the voiceover and to be honest, either make an audiobook or make a film. For a serious, adult, science-future film the logic-busting moments far outweighed any acting or visual thrills.
Without listing them there are some very silly moments. Do you know what the makers annoyed me with them, so here are a few.
The moment you have to travel to Mars to send a message to Neptune means that technology has gone backward in the future. The sneaking aboard the ship to Neptune in particular seemed to have been written and plotted by an over-excitable twelve-year-old that had a lot of sugary snacks. The hugely implausible incident that was there purely to give Brad Pitt an action hero moment later was frankly pathetic and insulting. The mystery of the power-surge was not explained and Tommy Lee Jones’ motivations seemed extreme to say the least. Without trying to sound superior or clever there was much on the screen that was somewhat childish.
The casting of the movie was strange, honestly tell me why Liv Tyler and Donald Sutherland were in the film and it was criminal to use Ruth Negga so briefly and then somehow make her look as if she had wandered in from another film set, she looked pissed-off through most of her scenes, hopefully it was acting but I would not be surprised if it is how she actually felt. There were some very poor supporting actors during the run time and if anyone can’t spot the worst one let’s just say computers should have replaced receptionists on the moon.
Now some very clever types will tell you this is not actually a science-fiction tale but a story of loss, redemption, regret and complicated dynamic behind driven people, well macho-men actually, and the never-ending conflict and confusion between fathers and their sons. All very good and actually not the first time and filmmaker has used a specific genre as a suit of clothes for the real story they want to take. Sorry but that is no excuse to ignore widely known science and facts and more or less abandon logic to drive home your story. In my view that is very lazy indeed.
All in all Ad Astra was a mess with just a few good moments. Science-fiction may seem to many to not be a serious topic and for nerds and kids but Ad Astra just shows how difficult it is. There was not even any monsters or aliens in this.
Watch the TV show The First at least the music is more atmospheric and exciting than this film.
I was actually looking forward to this film and felt let down by this poor lazy effort.
Pretty engrossing stuff.
I love the basement guy who plays chess.
There could be a whole tv show about that guy playing chess in the basement!
I don’t ever recall there being too many woman chess grandmasters.
Is this fiction? I don’t know. I don’t think I want to know.
Let’s see where this ends up. Will research on it after watching the whole series.
Well, now I see why this show is being talked about. Amazing start.
I have so much respect for Gunnhild. I never imagined I'd love her character this much when she came onto the show.
Allowing Instagram to Decide What I Watch While in Isolation
Day 1:
What an awful start to this experiment.
Shockingly bad performances, terrible editing, some of the worst dialogue ever put to screen and despite all that it still manages to be incredibly boring to watch.
Thankfully not another tired Taken clone. This one tries to be a bit more dramatic whilst having a few action sequences to bolster it.
It's a bit of a Rambo V in quality - ie. cheap and sombre. It does benefit from the relationship with the boy though.
It was okay. Predictable yet not boring. There has been worse put out by Neeson these last few years but you wouldn't watch this a second time.
6.25/10
STOP. GIVING. FILMS. WITH. MEDIOCRE. SCRIPTS. AND. CHARACTERS. A. GOOD. RATING.
There is no excuse for it in the 21st century. We know how to make coherent stories and good characters, and we should NOT FUCKING ACCEPT ANYTHING LESS.
You folks even admit it's got shallow characters and a nonsense story. That is not a 7-8, ,much less a 9. Five is AVERAGE. You have been normalized to not give anything below a Seven, and that is wrong and makes ratings pointless, and it makes YOU a consumerist goob.
Rant Over.
1/10 rating to compensate for all the noncritical consumerist trained monkeys.
:asterisk_symbol::asterisk_symbol:Random Thoughts on A F’n Random Film:asterisk_symbol::asterisk_symbol:
It’s a shame this version has none of the charm or wit of the Arnie original.
I blame Khal Momoa - he hasn’t the charisma at this point in his career to be other than a one-dimensional muscle-freak.
And even Arnie managed to raise a laugh - Jason didn’t even punch a camel!
Spudgun from Bottom gets his nose chopped off by a child and then is torn limb from limb by an angry mob!
(So pretty much what he was used to with Ritchie & Eddie then?)
Conan clotheslined a mounted man... with a battleship chain! :open_mouth:
I fully expected the coach to explode during the horsey chasing sequence. Very exciting - but quite ludicrous.
In an age before Oil of Ulay and Botox, the skin of the (many) stunning women looks incredible - must be those ancient heathen gods they worship and no artificial sweeteners.
Nathan Jones was a crap pro wrestler, a crapper MMA fighter, but at least an adequate monster-goon in fight scenes. Ditto Bob Sapp.
Queen Amidala really needs to lay off the hard drugs and emo music. But she is hot, in a worrying, Freddie-Krueger-style way... :rolling_eyes:
oh my god
fucking finally
this movie makes breach looks like a good film.... at least is not pretentious like this garbage.... WTF is happening?Who are allowing bad stuff like this to happen to begin with?
As a big horror fan, and also a BIG Jeffrey Dean Morgan fan, i was very very disappointed with this movie! Soooo many plot holes, sooo much exposition... I was pissed :D Some caracters are very smart and put one-and-one together like immediately, and the other ones are just stupid as f***! xD From the first scene to the last one - you know how this movie will end.
Some decent and some lame jump scares... just... I mean you can watch this movie if you want, but i cant recomend it... 4/10
The real horror in this episode was that social media is a sickness and influencers will do whatever it takes to be famous, being blinded by the consequences. It could have been written way better, not the best episode. ultra cringey ugh
A new opening that turned out to be the closure for X-men from 20th Century Fox. It is a pity because the potential was there.
Makes me embarrassed that I actually followed this comic book series as a child.
I’m so sick of getting excited by watching the trailer and then being disgusted by the actual movie
Like a battery powered toy robot, it's noisy, flashy and doesn't stand still, but it just runs along its pre-programmed track until it ends predictably.
Sadly, however, this doesn't just run out of juice, it makes a hysterically bad exit...
I was skeptical of the premise but this first episode quickly swept me into its sense of peril. Certainly worthy of continuing the journey. Please to see some quality casting choices.
Everything I wanted it to be and more. Perfectly cast and excellent soundtrack by Hans Zimmer. Epic Sci-Fi at its best.
Can’t believe Samuel L. Jackson is 72!
I thought this double opening episode was a blast. Clearly taking cues from the Star Wars animated shows but that's not a bad thing to me. This was high energy and exciting with some good mysteries presented.
I like some characters much more than others. Rok is great, Zero is kind of fascinating. Gwyn probably has more depth than the rest of the characters put together. Dal was the problematic one, far too in-your-face, so it's a shame that he's ostensibly the "lead" role.
Visually this was glorious too. I loved a lot of the designs and use of colour.
The big questions for me:
- How did the Protostar get there, and what happened to its crew?
- The bad guy said he had been searching for the ship for a long time, but we've been told by the creators that this show is set only a few years after Voyager, so something doesn't entirely add up at this point.
- Similarly, how come there were so many Alpha Quadrant species here? Mysterious!
What the fuck is this shit?
If I switched my brain off (as some have suggested) long enough to enjoy this I'd stay that way. Or worse, never regain consciousness ever again.
A great movie with Matt Damon's acting on point(as an outsider) .Miss these kind of casual-watch movies of 2010's..A Nice introspective movie.
I found this in a video rental store about 13 years ago under the titel Immortel, ad vitam, and have run across it once or twice since, actively looking for it. At the time, it was almost entirely unlike anything I'd ever seen before, whether French or American Sci-Fi cinema, and that stands today.
Here's the plot summary from Wikipedia:
The film takes place in New York City in late 21 century, where genetically altered humans live side by side with unaltered men and women, and where Central Park has been mysteriously encased in an "intrusion zone" where people who attempt to enter are instantly killed. A strange pyramid has appeared over the city; inside, the gods of ancient Egypt have judged Horus, one of their fellow gods, to cease his immortality.
In the city below, Jill, a young woman with blue hair, is arrested. She is not completely human; her tissues appear to be no more than a few months old according to an examining physician, although her physical form is already that of an adult. She also possesses a number of secret powers, including one that enables her to procreate with gods, though she knows nothing of this. Horus is given a limited time to interact with the humans of New York and procreate. During his search for a host body, Horus encounters Nikopol, a rebel condemned to 30 years of hibernation who, due to a mechanical accident, escapes his prison one year early.
Horus has been unsuccessful in attempting to take over the bodies of other humans; due to an incompatibility with the genetic alterations humans have undergone, the host bodies self-destruct while attempting to accommodate a god. Nikopol's body is acceptable as it has been frozen in prison/storage and not undergone the genetic changes causing the rejections. Horus takes partial control of Nikopol's body and starts looking for a woman he can mate with to provide him a son before his death sentence is carried out. When Horus/Nikopol discovers Jill, they become entangled in a web of murder and intrigue.
Watch this if you appreciate truly creative and out-there films. It's experimental, it's visually gorgeous and unique in a way that no mainstream film that leans on computer-generated imagery to this degree ever is; it is the anti-Hollywood "Sci-Fi" film. There are ancient Egyptian alien gods; blue, engineered meta-humans; main characters being possessed by said alien gods; intelligent, transgenic shark assassins, and... I'll be honest, the last time I saw it years ago, I can't be sure how much I was able to follow the story, and it's nearly impossible to find via official channels. If you get the chance, see it. It'll be worth your time whether or not you are able to fully grasp the entire story.
Note: This film is apparently a film adaptation of a French language graphic novel series by Yugoslavian-born Enki Bilal, and to me it does have the same feel of compressed story elements like a 90-minute OVA of a manga series, only with more competent cinematic execution, a larger budget, and more cinematically artistically mature storytelling.
You know... when people tell you to shut up... you shut the fuck up.
Also what is it with the 30 minutes.
I think that finally all the inconsistency that this movie had does not matter. It doesn't matter that some villains are there and others are not, that the spell does not make sense, nothing deserves to be explained. And it is not necessary. Perhaps the only thing that matters is that the power that Marvel has to hoard every movie theather, and that in Peru, for example, they have violated their seat separation protocols, that they are charging more to see this movie, even in its third week, without being possible to have discounts on tickets (when even movies in their first week of release have). You might say that all this is external to the film, of course. But if Spiderman: No Way Home references things external to this movie all the time (not just the past Spiderman movies, but even the meta commentary on those movies, which comes from how silly they are to every line from Jaime Foxx about how he is more comfortable in this one). When the film takes us out of its narrative with all this, I think it is allowed that I too can get out of it to think about all this external that I have commented.
This is just one side, of course, and I'm sure I'm being mean or a smartass, sure. Even without all this, the movie should at least be entertaining. Of course, for some, that are so tired and I understand it, entertainment equals quality, "I had fun, ergo it's good." OK. But understand that there are thousands of ways to entertain yourself with a movie, to have fun. It happens with bad movies, The Room, for example, but it happens with the experience of going to the cinema as well (I think of the scene in which Jerry Seinfeld wants to go to see Planet 9 From Outer Space, but not alone, because otherwise it would not be entertaining ). I'm not asking Seinfeld to rate the film, but we are on Rate Your Music, we have to rate. I understand that some have fun with mediocre films, I think that to a greater or lesser extent we have all found ways to do it, but there are some that we can separate that: I surely entertained myself, maybe hate-watching Spiderman: No Way Home, and although I know what to expect with hese films, I think one of the highest grossing films of all time should have at least a clean script (I really wouldn't ask for more than that). I can't lower my standards, and that's okay, I'm not making my life miserable, I'm having fun in my own way (don't pity me poor me). But this fun, at least for me (and that is what many fail to understand) is beyond the fact that the film seems coherent to me.
Even so I found my way of making my experience watching Spiderman: No Way Home interesting, maybe egocentrical, and entertaining. This movie is by no means fun. The first two were okay, fine. Now they say this is stupid or that it embraces stupidity. Okay, but at the same time they are trying to sell us a conflicting Spiderman, who instead of going to chase the Green Goblin, prefers to tell the public that he wants to kill him. A Spiderman that almost acknowledges that he is in a film and knowing what's gonna happen next (he ask is Dr. Octopus knows him, because he called him by name, but everybody knows he is Peter Parker; he doesn't think there are new villains, he thinks something weird is going on). The downside this time around is that the show feels overly plastic, and that wouldn't be a problem if the movie wasn't trying to sell us the Spiderman drama.
And this is my way of having fun, you can't accuse me of being no fun. Okay, you can accuse me of being a cynical fuck, yes. But this is fun. And it's also depressing, of course. Is laughing to avoid crying.
If I want to say something good... well, maybe at least we have Daredevil on the MCU (but they are definitely not gonna reach the series highs, hell, not even the lows... How the fuck can you introduce him and get rid of him right away, there is a trial that we needed a lot more of, that should've been its own half an hour. And even when introduced you just skip all the good parts, how can Daredevil catching that ball be in screen for just a instant, don't you know how to zoom in, make momentum, fuck).
Okay, maybe it is good that Spiderman is kind of restarted now. I'll keep on wanting a better film out of this Spiderman. And I'll have fun while doing it.
Incredibly uninspired.
I haven’t seen one of these in a while, but even I noticed that a lot of its visuals and ideas are directly lifted from better comic book movies.
And it’s ugly, really ugly. Way too heavy on the generic orange/teal color palette, way too much slomo, not a single ounce of tangibility.
They should've just gone all in with making the artifice a stylistic choice, make it look like 300 or something. The hybrid of stylized CGI noise with a world that’s supposed to look at least somewhat real doesn’t work.
The movie itself will have lost any sense of relevancy within a couple of weeks. Yes, despite ‘changing the hierarcy of power in the DC Universe’, there’s not much of interest going on here.
I just feel bad for Dwayne Johnson, the man clearly has a talent that suits this type of film, but he’s stuck in a time where adrenaline driven action filmmaking is at its absolute blandest. This needed way more bite and edge in order to cover up for the basic premise. It’s such a shrug of a movie as is.
3.5/10
Its not a documentary it’s classed as science fiction. It’s already been publicised it’s not going to be factual at all, it’s going to be some alternative reality version of Cleopatra. It’s a shame because it could have been good.
The ending of this episode creates very strong feelings in me. I'm not sure if I'm angry, confused, irritated, offended, pranked or excited.
That kind of cliffhanger should not happen with a series where it's unknown, when (and if at all) it continues.
Additionally, it's too obvious that Mr. World is Loki (too many hints) and that he needs to sacrifice Tech Boy, while it was also too obvious that Shadow is just some kind of resurrection pill for Wednesday. Besides that, still no clue what Bilquis' mission is, where Gungnir has been or why Laura still seems to be somehow important even though it wasn't even planned that she survives Sweeney's murder.
Oh, and I still wish for a return of Mad Sweeney. Sad to say, but IMHO the show lacks his best character since he got pulverized.
If you love movies and time or at least love being alive.
NEVER WATCH THIS....THING