This movie is insane and terrible and I think I need to watch it every day. I was laughing from the very first second. The fist indicator that this film was being phoned in by literally everybody was when the opening titles was just white text on a black screen. No one bothered to make even a 5 second opening title sequence. It's then immediately followed by an opening scene with some of the clunkiest dialogue I've ever heard, combined with the most laughable zooms in the editing. It's truly a bizarre thing to see.
Dakota Johnson is giving an absolute max of 80% at any given moment, and has a few line deliveries that had me dying laughing, both intentionally and unintentionally. Everything to do with the villain and his assistant from Girls is pure insanity, from "de-aging" the girls 10 years by simply removing their masks in the picture, to all the ADR, it's all confounding. Adam Scott is certainly there, saying his lines, along with Emma Roberts. Neither of them have much of an impact on the story except to tangentially connect Cassie to an infant, alternate universe version of a character we already know, but they sure are there and saying things.
TL:DR This movie makes every wrong choice and I want to spend the rest of my life trying to understand it
2024-01-01T00:00:00Z2024-12-31T23:59:59Z