Kojak: The Price of Justice

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... the Modern Woman! Fierce! Independent! Uncompromising! Bask in her radiance!

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 1x23 Quest For He-Man

Imaginative, entertaining, and trippy.
The only complaint I've got is that Plundor's model wasn't on point.
His nose should have been much bigger.

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe

Wowie Zowie! It's time for my favourite show!
Jobber-Man and the Masters of Emasculatory Propaganda!

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 2x07 Of Machines and Men

Yas Kween! Slay! Slay!!! You don't need no man!

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The New Adventures of Jonny Quest: 1x01 Peril of the Reptilian

Well, that's all the proof I need. Spielberg is a complete hack.

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 2x03 Out of the Past

My Mary-Sue Self-Insert and the Masters of the Universe.

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 2x02 To Walk with Dragons

How... how is this even possible? How did you manage to make a kaiju free-for-all less entertaining than watching paint dry?

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 2x01 The Last Stand

Man stupid! Woman smart! Obey the Message!

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 1x21 Snake Pit

That's some nice blackwashing you've got there. The Message at its finest.

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 1x19 Orko's Garden

You will conform to THE MESSAGE.

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 1x15 The Mystery of Anwat Gar

Weebtastic! The suits are laughable, but the episode itself is fairly entertaining.

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 1x14 Underworld

Why. Why does this version of He-Man have to be such a lousy jobber?

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 1x11 Turnabout

I'm slowly getting tired of this emasculatory propaganda.

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 1x05 The Curse of the Spellstone

"A person doesn't need super powers to be a hero. All he needs... is bravery. You forgot that, Skeletor."

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 1x09 The Ties That Bind

That's enough of Teela's BS for one season, I think.

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Jonny Quest: 1x03 The Curse of Anubis

This one was my introduction to the horror genre, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

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The Angry Beavers: 2x19 The Day the World Got Really Screwed Up!

Words cannot convey the awesomness that is Oxnard Montalvo.

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The Angry Beavers: 3x15 Pass It On!

I'd watch that anime.

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He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: 1x02 The Beginning (2)

Teela's charming personality isn't doing this show any favors.

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The Cat in the Hat

I like it.
There, I've said it, and there ain't a god-damned thing you can do about it.

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G.I. Joe: Resolute

I've seen more stakes in vegan restaurants.

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Ulysses 31: 1x24 The Lotus Eaters

That's enough! This is an intervention!

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Ulysses 31: 1x21 Rebellion on Lemnos

Commendable effort. Crappy execution. Cute facial hair.

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Constant Payne

An inspiring male role model and a teenage girl who isn't a prissy, entitled cun*? Unacceptable! CAN IT!!!

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The Amazing Screw-On Head

The fact that this masterpiece didn't get a full-fledged show proves beyond all doubt that we live in the darkest timeline.

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Ulysses 31: 1x12 The Seat of Forgetfulness

The word "god" is for me nothing more than the expression and product of human weaknesses.

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Ulysses 31: 1x04 Cronus, Father of Time

Eat your heart out, Dio.

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The Dukes of Hazzard

An inept, forgettable, and poorly structured mockery of the source material. It takes a long, drawn out piss on the original series, spits in the face of anyone who's an actual fan, and tries to distract you with botox and plastic tits in the hopes tha you won't notice.

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Hobo with a Shotgun

You're riding shotgun.

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Gandahar

Just look at all the new sexual fetishes you've discovered!

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