Review by JasperKazai

Star Trek 2009

Review by JasperKazai
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BlockedParentSpoilers2024-03-11T20:36:49Z

I enjoyed this well enough back when it came out. I wasn't a Trek fan in the past, so all the bits about alternate timelines and whatnot were completely lost on me. I understand what they were doing, now.
I also understand why many Star Trek fans were not pleased with this film. They just turned Star Trek into a fairly brainless action flick. Not that Trek was ever devoid of action, but it was almost always done intelligently. This, on the other hand, is a collection of fairly nonsensical events.

  • Why is a mining vessel so well-armed? Well-armed enough to take out multiple Federation starships at once? Its large size and the planet drill thing make sense, but it doesn't make sense why'd they be so strong in combat otherwise.
  • Why was Spock's mother with the culture council thing? She's a human, she wouldn't be on the council. Mega convenient they were all in the same room at that exact moment, though.
  • Kirk is ejected down at the exact planet where future-Spock happens to be. Not only that, but he ran for his life from two different creatures, and just so happened to head in the exact direction that future-Spock was located. Wow. (Side note, why is a predator that lives on a snow planet bright red?)
  • Earth is a big ol' planet, yet the Romulan drill thing happens to be right in San Francisco where Starfleet Academy is. Lol

You know one thing that's good, though? At least the bridge in this film has plenty of lights on. All of the nuTrek TV shows take place in the fucking dark. Turn some damn lights on!

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