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Open Haus

Season 2016 2016

  • 2016-01-05T14:00:00Z on Rooster Teeth
  • 10 mins
  • 8 hours, 40 mins
  • United States
  • Comedy, Talk Show

Open Haus takes time every week to answer questions from the Funhaus fans. Ranging from gaming and YouTube questions to waaaaay off-topic queries, Open Haus combines the Q&A format with a highly edited, comedic format.

52 episodes

2016x01 We Have ALL THE ANSWERS?

  • Season Premiere

    2016-01-05T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

A new year, a new Open Haus. But is anything really different in this, the year of Your Lord 2016? Yes. In this episode we don't use any photoshops because we were really pressed for time on the edit.

2016x02 We MAKE A MOVIE?

  • 2016-01-12T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

I miss you, Joel.

2016x03 We Are PARTY ANIMALS?

  • 2016-01-19T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

Enjoy this episode of Open Haus with the full cast, because we're not going to have another full cast episode until everyone is back from Australia. Yup, the gang's all here: Adam, James, Lawrence, Bruce, Joel, Elyse, Spoole, and Peake. The whole Funhaus crew, chucklin' it up on the old laughnet. Oh wait Lawrence isn't in this episode. Fuck it, broken casts for 3 straight weeks.

2016x04 How to Get Over a BREAKUP?

  • 2016-01-26T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

You may notice that we have a few chairs empty today; that's because James and Elyse and Bruce are out in Australia. That mean it's this is a very special episode starring... THE B TEAM! That's right, it's the Best of the Rest, the Leftovers, the Dudes Back Home! Honestly, we weren't even sure if we could pull this together without the rest of the crew, but hey. We sacked up, decided it's OK if we're not quite as funny as everyone else, and dammit, we turned those webcams on and answered your questions. So be grateful you even have an episode, you ingrates. I don't want to hear any complaints about who's not here. Because we're giving you everything we've got.

2016x05 Our NEW JOBS?

  • 2016-02-02T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

Hey guys (and girl)! James here! Traveling can be fun, but you know what isn't? Making videos when there's only like four of us in the office. "But there's six of you in this very video," you'll no doubt retort. Well, despite how it may appear, Peake is actually just a large stack of cardboard boxes and Joel is a computer generated hologram; like Hastune Miku or Debra Messing. Anyway, things should be back to normal by next week, so until then, please watch us talk about hacking, superheroes, abortion, and plenty other stuff that kids 'jive' about in the school yard. Oops! I just pooped my pants. Gotta go!

2016x06 How To BE ROMANTIC?

  • 2016-02-09T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

Boy do I have great news for you. James (me) is going to write another Open Haus description! The only problem is... I'm not sure what to write it about. I'd make it something about the episode, but I don't want to spoil it. Maybe if I just tickle your collective fancies with a tasty morsel of things to come. Hmm... Let's see... what's good, but not so good that you'll only need to read the description and not watch the episode. Well... what about... Oh! I've got it! In this episode-- [Character Limit Reached]

2016x07 SPOOLE DIES AT THE END?

  • 2016-02-16T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

Now I've had the time of my life No, I've never felt like this before Yes I swear it's the truth And I owe it all to you 'Cause I've had the time of my life And I owe it all to you I've been waiting for so long Now I've finally found someone To stand by me We saw the writing on the wall As we felt this magical fantasy Now with passion in our eyes There's no way we could disguise it secretly So we take each others hand 'Cause we seem to understand the urgency Just remember You're the one thing I can't get enough of So I'll tell you something This could be love, because I've had the time of my life No I've never felt this way before Yes I swear it's the truth, And I owe it all to you Hey Baby With my body and soul I want you more than you'll ever know So we'll just let it go, don't be afraid to lose control, no Yes I know what's on your mind, when you say "Stay with me tonight" (Stay with me) Just remember, you're the one thing, I can't get enough of So I'll tell you something, This could be love because I've had the time of my life, (I've had the time of my life) No, I've never felt this way before, Yes I swear it's the truth (Yes I swear) And I owe it all to you Cause I've had the time of my life And I've searched through every open door (through everywhere) Till I found the truth And I owe it all to you (Instrumental) (REPEAT 2X) Now I've had the time of my life No I never felt this way before (Never Felt this way) Yes I swear it's the truth And I owe it all to you I've had the time of my life No I never felt this way before Yes I swear it's the truth And I owe it all to you 'Cause I've had the time of my life And I've searched through every open door Till I've found the truth And I owe it all to you

2016x08 WHY ARE GIRLS?

  • 2016-02-23T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

False question. The real question is HOW are girls? And the answer varies. Sometimes well. Sometimes sick. Sometimes hot, sometimes cold depending on the weather. Sometimes girls are happy and they're just as often sad. The important thing to remember is that girls are just like you and me. Don't be afraid of them. Show them the same respect you'd show your best mate, or your mother who -- believe it or not -- is a girl! Remember that girls are people and girls will treat you like people, too!

2016x09 How to BE SINGLE?

  • 2016-03-01T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

So Leo finally won. I guess that's good and all. But honestly I'd have preferred if he lost. First of all, I feel like at this late a date it's a consolation prize for everything he DIDN'T win for. He was WAYYY better in Wolf of Wall Street. But second, and more importantly, at this point it's just fucking hilarious. I love that he doesn't win. I love the memes. I love how he pretends he doesn't care. I love watching people freak out about it. And they've taken that away from me, goddammit.

2016x10 Funhaus SEX TIPS?

  • 2016-03-08T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

Our new office setup really makes Open Haus much better, wouldn't you say. We're sitting in a big circle. A donut, if you will, all facing inward. Constantly looking at each other, into each others' eyes, all day. The souls of all are bared to all, no secrets are hidden, and trust is the currency of our love. When I look across the chasm of the donut and I can see Lawrence intently gazing at me, I know we are one. And when James locks eyes with Bruce, I know why they married each other. This office was meant to be. We inhabit the same mindspace, sharing intimate thoughts. Working as one. Living as one. Forever in eternity. So yeah, the desks are really helping out Open Haus.

2016x11 How to Make a BILLION DOLLARS?

  • 2016-03-15T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

I want to take this platform to address something that's been really bugging me over the last few months: Fail Army's Fail of the Week videos. I feel like they've gotten way more self aware, lamer, and dumber. The number of people who say "FAIL ARMY" at the end of their videos has drastically increased. And what's worse, they're including so many videos are just AREN'T FAILS! Cute animal videos are NOT A FAIL Pranks are NOT A FAIL Getting yelled at by an old man is NOT A FAIL Come on. Get it the fuck together guys. Our Fridays depend on you.

2016x12 Funhaus GONE WILD?

  • 2016-03-22T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Tensions are running high. James hates Peake. Peake hates Elyse. Elyse hates everyone. Everyone hates Bruce. It's a rough time in the old Funhaus office, so I asked everyone here to say something really kind and nice, to try and ease the stress. Bruce: "This is a dumb exercise." Lawrence: "Leave me alone." Adam: "Joel stop. Just -- just stop." James: "Get away from me." Elyse: "No." Peake: "I'm busy." Omar: "....." Benson: (peed on my foot) Billie: (pooped on the pee on my foot)

2016x13 We LOVE SHREK?

  • 2016-03-29T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Around the office we call Elyse the Mistress of Ten Thousand Voices. Her impersonations, as you've seen, are spot on. You've already been privy to her impression of Bruce, of Keira Knightly, and of Spoole. But what you haven't seen is Elyse's full grab bag of stage-ready vocal mimicry. I'm telling you she's the best. Last night we were able to convince Elyse to do one of her classics: Bill Clinton imitating Nic Cage doing Jim Carrey as Oprah impersonating Bugs Bunny acting like Arnold mimicking Ella Fitzgerald pretending to be Mr. T aping PewDiePie emulating Nixon affecting Dirty Harry caricaturing Joan Rivers sending up Kermit the Frog copying Tina Fey mirroring Sylvester Stallone echoing Mr. Magoo portraying Dolly Parton posing as Homer Simpson representing a car alarm that sounds like the Vienna Boy's Choir singing in the style of Elvis performing as Mother Theresa. It was pretty amazing.

2016x14 Funhaus BOARD GAME?

  • 2016-04-05T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Thank you for purchasing the all new Open Haus board game! This is a game for 6-9 players. Contents of Box: 4 webcams and 1 Omar Cam, 9 office chairs, 1 SF Giants bobblehead, 1 quiet intern, and a Reddit account pre-subscribed to the Funhaus Subreddit. You'll need: 5-8 friends and one Matt Peake, various props and costumes and sex toys. How to Play: All players sit at a table facing each other. Using the provided Reddit account, source 5-9 questions from the Funhaus Subreddit. Make sure they're the same questions asked every week. Bonus points for a F/M/K or Game of Thrones question. Begin recording using the provided webcams. Starting with the player in the "Adam" spot, ask the players questions, laughing or ignoring the answers depending on who's answering. Feel free to use any props/costumes/sex toys on hand to enhance your answers. Cease play when you reach the end of the questions, or when the player in the "Bruce" position gets bored. Take the recording, and edit it heavily over the course of 3 days. Using the provided quiet intern, create dozens of photoshops people will see for 3.5 seconds each. Upload the video (making sure to monetize in all countries). The commentors on the video will decide the winner. Have fun!!

2016x15 JOEL HATES FUNHAUS

  • 2016-04-12T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Goodbye everyone. It's really been fun.

2016x16 HOW LONG CAN WE HOLD OUR BREATH?

  • 2016-04-19T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Here we are again. Another day, another OpenHaus. What more can we say? Have a great weekend. Then again, we finished this video on Friday. It's Tuesday for you. Signed, Matt Peake

2016x17 MILFS LOVES US?

  • 2016-04-26T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Did you know that the entire Harry Potter series was written in a single night? It's true. Find out more fun facts like this in Open Haus. An informative series where we provide YOU with fun facts from AROUND THE GLOBE!

2016x18 WE KILL CELEBRITIES?

  • 2016-05-03T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

"Damn it, Peake! The Commissioner is crawling up my keister about the trail of bodies you left back at that warehouse sting! You're a loose cannon! I know those Peruvian smugglers killed your wife and daughter last week but god help me if you don't get your head straight, I'll have you emptying meters on Pico by the end of the week!"

2016x19 WE LOVE DEATH?

  • 2016-05-10T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

"Dang it, Bones! The Constable is crawling up my tuckus about the pinata full of gummie bears you left back at that schoolhouse! You're a loose tiger! I know those Jamican exchange students liked your cat and goldfish last week but god help me if you don't get your giblets straight, I'll have you emptying pencil sharpeners in Math class by the end of the week!"

2016x20 WE ARE GROATS

  • 2016-05-17T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

In the ruins of our UnCivil War with the boys of AH, we try and begin the healing process by giving all of you some much needed Slash-Fic fuel.

2016x21 WE BE QUEEFIN'?

  • 2016-05-24T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Somehow we're still talking about dead celebrities, but at least this time we have Cr1tikal and Barbara Dunkelman here to help us out.

2016x22 WE ARE GIRLY?

  • 2016-05-31T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Peake explores his deep desire to go on a grand Ewok adventure and fight a Gorax or whatever. Meanwhile, the rest of the team uses democracy to determine who is the girliest in the land.

2016x23 OUR OWN CELEBRITY THREESOME?

  • 2016-06-07T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Spider-Larr hears the wail of sirens, leaps to his feet, throws his manga to the floor, dons his suit, checks his web cartridges, glances at the manga, unzips his suit, reads a little more, has a light snack, passes out around 7:45.

2016x24 MAKING A MURDERER?

  • 2016-06-14T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

1. Bash had never been pistol-whipped before but he could already tell he wasn’t a fan. Slowly regaining consciousness in the deli’s basement had been an ordeal. His thoughts, half-formed and ugly, took their sweet damn time to return. The first of them was something vaguely related to the shrieking agony in his head. The second dealt with the gun barrel resting comfortably in his mouth. The third demanded that he piss himself right then and there in his brand new slacks. Bash complied without hesitation.

2016x25 WEEKEND AT BURNIE BURNS?

  • 2016-06-21T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

11. “Those old, nameless bastards we work for are beautiful and terrible and absolute. They are also archaic and far too patient. We are none of these things.” The figure leaned in closer. It’s flesh had begun to seep. It’s eyes, greasy puddles of indigo. “We are angry...and petty...and bored. We want back in. Not when those adorable omnipotent sleepyheads finally decide to put a pot of coffee on. Now.”

2016x26 SECRET ORGY AT RTX?

  • 2016-06-28T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Reasons I've never been to an orgy: 1. Allergic to latex. 2. Sold all my Venetian masks. 3. Would feel obligated to stay and help clean up. 4. Nobody likes me.

2016x27 FUNHAUS HUMAN CENTIPEDE

  • 2016-07-05T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

I am writing this after 3 ridiculous days of RTX and have zero cleverness to give you. My deepest apologies. I go sleep-sleep now.

2016x28 SNIFF CELEBRITY BUTTS?

  • 2016-07-12T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Dapper Danny Ocean (Jet Li) is a man of action. Less than 24 hours into filming some internet videos, the wry, charismatic thief is already rolling out his next plan. Following three rules: Don't sniff any butts, don't cry unless the pain is physical, and make sure to bow twice before diving into Hatsune Miku's cheeks. Jet, I mean uhhh... Danny then gets the other Ocean's ten together to watch Hachi: A Dog's Tale.

2016x29 WHAT IS POKEMON GO?

  • 2016-07-19T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

IX: Slowly, the beast looked down at his new adversary. Torrid breath steamed rhythmically through the holes in his steel mask. Its scarred body screamed the tales of countless battles, none of them lost. Farinfoor tightened his grip, hoping perhaps to give the thing one more wound to tend before it dispatched him. The wall of flesh stared down at Farinfoor through entombed eyes for what felt like an epoch. Then it looked up.

2016x30 WE BUNCH MOX?

  • 2016-07-26T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

XV: His heart racing, Farinfoor’s eyes darted around the room. “Where is he?! Where is The Impetus?” The peculiar little man relaxed only slightly. “Whoa! Back up a sec. The what? I don’t know any Impetu-” Farinfoor charged at the small nuisance, fixing his blade beneath his neck. He had come too far to be delayed by some irrelevant sycophant. “The Impetus! The maker! The helmsman of this gruesome, remorseless world!” “Oh.” the man said. He smiled nervously, a hint of fortitude leaking back into his voice. “I guess that’d be me.”

2016x31 FUNHAUS IN PLAYBOY?

  • 2016-08-02T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

XXII: “I had towers of journals riddled with drawings and descriptions of this place. Monsters, heroes, kingdoms, mythologies! The more rich and detailed this world became the less time I had to spend in my own. My folks worried a little but they were mostly glad I wasn’t bothering them.” Harry leaned his head on Farinfoor as he spoke. Something about the simple gesture reeked of arrogance. “But then something insane happened. A girl talked to me. And well, to be honest, I kinda forgot about my journals after that.”

2016x32 WE GO RETRO?

  • 2016-08-09T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

XXIX: Farinfoor permitted himself a joyless laugh as the pervasive, throbbing percussive beats slowed, quited, and ceased. All was still. Even the clamor of the battle outside abruptly vanished, its combatants seeming at once to forget their function. He peered down at this sea of bewilderment and felt some strange sentiment take hold. A sensation on unequaled possibility. Farinfoor turned from the window, eager to join friend and foe alike on the plain below when the tower suddenly began to shudder and moan.

2016x33 WE TRY TOO HARD?

  • 2016-08-16T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

They asked Jacob to make the photoshops for this episode. He dutifully did them. Jacob doesn't talk much any more. He mostly just stares off into space as an occasional shudder passes through his body.

2016x34 WE PLAY DRESS-UP?

  • 2016-08-23T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Edi Amin's full self-bestowed title: "His Excellency, President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hadji Doctor Idi Amin Dada, VC, DSO, MC, Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Seas and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular" Also he probably ate people. You win this round, Elyse.

2016x35 COOLEST PARTY EVER?

  • 2016-08-30T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Yub nub, eee chop yub nub; Ah toe meet toe pee chee keene; G'noop dock fling oh ah. Yah wah, eee chop yah wah; Ah toe meet toe peechee keene; G'noop dock fling oh ah. Coatee cha tu yub nub; Coatee cha tu yah wah; Coatee cha tu glowah; Allay loo ta nuv. Glowah, eee chop glowah; Ya glowah pee chu nee foom, Ah toot dee awe goon daa. *Coatee cha tu goo; (Yub nub!) Coatee cha tu doo; (Yah wah!) Coatee cha tu too; (Ya chaa!) Allay loo ta nuv, Allay loo ta nuv, Allay loo ta nuv. Glowah, eee chop glowah. Ya glowah pee chu nee foam; Ah toot dee awe goon daa. Coatee cha tu goo; (Yub nub!) Coatee cha tu doo; (Yah wah!) Coatee cha tu too; (Ya chaa!) Allay loo ta nuv, Allay loo ta nuv, Allay loo ta nuv, Allay loo ta nuv.

2016x36 WE DATE OUR FANS?

  • 2016-09-06T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

I wish I could go back to a time when eating dried up tiny marshmallows out of a bowl would fill me with satisfaction. Now just crawling out of bed in the morning and yearning for puffed corn and the halcyon days will have to suffice.

2016x37 OUR BIGGEST REGRET?

  • 2016-09-13T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

I just try to regret everything I do as I'm doing it. It tends to save me a lot of time on the back end.

2016x38 WORST PAIN EVER?

  • 2016-09-20T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

I think it would have to be that time when I was a sophomore in high school and that freshman called me fat in front of the whole geometry class and threatened to cut off my ponytail. Oh. You meant physical pain.

2016x39 HOW TO BE A HACKER?

  • 2016-09-27T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Actual Menu Items served at Guy Fieri's restaurants provided without commentary: Guy-talian Fondue Dippers, Righteous Rojo Rings, Brutha's Badass Caesar Salad, Tatted-Up Turkey Burger, Parmageddon Wings, S'mores Monte Cristo, Sashimi Won-Tacos, Pepperoni Studded Lasagna, Ferndale Lumber Jack.  

2016x40 WE'RE MOVING TO MARS?

  • 2016-10-04T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

This is the plan. Get your ass to Mars, and go to the Hilton Hotel and flash the fake Brubaker I.D. at the front desk, that's all there is to it. Just do as I tell you. You can nail that son of a b***h that f****d you and me. I'm counting on you, old buddy. Don't let me down!

2016x41 OUR DEEPEST SECRETS?

  • 2016-10-11T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

My deepest secret is the recipe for these absolutely scrumptious lemon bars. That and the subterranean sex club I run out of my house. The secret ingredient for both? Love.  

2016x42 WE IMPROVE SONIC?

  • 2016-10-18T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

Humble beginnings are a staple of American life. One can only hope that when their time comes, they can boast that they once spouted obnoxious noises on a beloved 90's sitcom.

2016x43 THE HAUNTED FUNHAUS?

  • 2016-10-25T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

The idea of wrestling with a greased up Matt Peake in an insane asylum does not sound like something in a haunted house. It sounds like heaven. 

2016x44 TECHNOLOGY TAKES OVER?

  • 2016-11-01T13:00:00Z — 10 mins

I'm gonna be honest with you guys. I just got done with the drunk stream and I'm all out of funny. You try and be humorous after 46 minutes of "Silk Stalkings"! I f*$%ing dare you!

2016x45 WE GET SPUNKED?

  • 2016-11-08T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

I honestly think that my very first rumblings of sexuality were brought on by watching Mo from "GUTS". She was just poured into that refs jersey.

2016x46 BEST TORTURE EVER?

  • 2016-11-15T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

Trying to wring ten minutes of comedy out of these guys guys is torture enough. Am I right? Right? I'll pack my things.

2016x47 WE MAKE FUNHAUS GREAT AGAIN?

  • 2016-11-22T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

We don't really have any super brown people to denigrate and oppress but I supposed if we had to we could build a wall around Omar and Jacob.

2016x48 SEX WITH CARTOONS?

  • 2016-11-29T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

I blame Jim Belushi for all these siblings of dead celebrities getting so much work in Hollywood. But then I blame Jim Belushi for most of the s#!t wrong with this world. 

2016x49 WE HAUNT EACH OTHER

  • 2016-12-06T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

Today in "Ghost Dad" IMDB trivia that seems creepy in retrospect:Raven-Symoné auditioned for the role of Amanda Hopper but was deemed too young for the part. However, Bill Cosby liked her so much he then cast her as Olivia Kendall on The Cosby Show (1984).

2016x50 WE MAKE A VR PORN GAME?

  • 2016-12-13T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

By the time she won the coveted role of Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, Judy Garland was already addicted to barbiturates and amphetamines. The Producer of the film then put Garland on a daily diet of chicken soup, black coffee, and cigarettes. Happy Holidays, everybody!" 

2016x51 BIGGER THAN JESUS

  • 2016-12-20T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

All I want for Christmas is Rahul Kohli to speak to me for five god-damn minutes with that sweet accent of his. He could read a phone book or tell me I have cancer. I don't care.

2016x52 QUESTIONS DONE QUICK?

  • 2016-12-27T14:00:00Z — 10 mins

Do you love Open Haus but just wish there were about six more substantially less funny people crammed into the shot dragging things down?  Boy are you in luck!

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