filmtoaster
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Thoroughbreds
The Strangers: Prey at Night
Peter Rabbit

I guess I forgot to log this one, I don't know why I didn't before. Just a few QUICK thoughts, Peter Rabbit is a strangely decent children's movie that touches on a few bases that the adult-friendly The LEGO Movie harnesses, and manages to secure a jolly little ride. Plenty of fourth-wall breaks, hilariously edited action montages, courtesy of Peter Menzies Jr., ironic jokes, and some glorious comedic timing. Domhnall Gleeson is quickly becoming one of my most favorite Irish actors, and the very second he comes on-screen, he steals the whole movie. The picture starts off slow and imitative, but Gleeson's charming and wild performance makes the feature a worthwhile price of admission. I wouldn't go full-price showing, but a Tuesday discount or MoviePass entrance will be sure to give you a number of good laughs. Very surprised about this one. If you were predicting Sony to treat the property akin to their hideous live-action The Smurfs adaptations, you will be surprised too.

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Death Wish
Mary and The Witch's Flower

You know that thing people do when they re-watch a movie to test if it was the initial hype or bias blinding them from objective deconstructing? Well, re-watching Mary and the Witch's Flower did the opposite, it confirmed my hype. My rating is actually going up to my perfect-tier. I had tears in my eyes during the credits. Any film that can do that automatically gets five stars, because that is so hard to do to me. I don't like to think I'm cynical towards movies, but at the same time, I think movies have to earn their emotional pay-offs, I hate being cheated. I don't at all feel cheated with Mary. I had minor problems with the script the first viewing, but on a second-view, I don't have those problems anymore. I absolutely adore this movie, I hope more people can see this. Because this was a Fathom Events, we got a sneak-preview after the movie showing concept art for Studio Ponoc's next movie. I'm so happy the movie was a success to further their studio along.

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Annihilation
Early Man
Samson
My Little Pony: The Movie
The Shape of Water
The Dark Tower

Not one scene lasts more than two minutes. I started timing it, like I got a calculator out and starting counting the amount of time each scene had. As someone who's becoming a professional editor, this movie offends me. This is beyond embarrassing. This is a marvel. It needs to be shown in film and editing classes on what not to do. You could study this. Sony's lucky they had Jumanji last year. I almost want them to fail after this pile of predictable, formulaic, mediocre, bland, and sensory-raping trash. I started laughing my ass off at one part where Matthew McConaughey's dialogue didn't match his lips at all. I had to take frequent breaks every ten minutes just so I could stomach this hour and a half disaster. Like, just, fuck this movie and everyone who edited it.

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Mary and The Witch's Flower
The Room
Insidious: The Last Key
Annie Oakley

Annie Oakley > Atomic Blonde

I have nothing else to say about this, I just decided to make a random comment as I marathon a bunch of short films before the year ends. Happy New Year, everyone!

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Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle
Downsizing
The Fat and Lean Wrestling Match

Easily my favorite of all of Georges Méliès' films. I was actually laughing out-loud while watching this. An silly and over-the-top visual acting comedy sketch that's timeless in it's humor.

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Romeo Is Bleeding
Roman J. Israel, Esq.

Walked out fifty minutes in. Roman's like autistic Ben Affleck from The Accountant, only this movie's not good and it sucks and it can go to hell. There's so much wrong with it, I won't bother writing it. It's clear the writer didn't bother either. For any poor souls with time to waste on this shit, take a shot any time Denzel Washington pushes his glasses up and rubs his face. Take three shots of hard liquor every time he eats a peanut butter sandwich. You will die in the first twenty minutes.

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Coco
Olaf's Frozen Adventure
Blade Runner 2049

Not sure how to rate this one. Just saw it. Will have to let it sit with me for a bit. I do know that I liked it, though. Just not sure if I only liked or loved it.

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Michael Lives: The Making of Halloween

Easily one of the best movie making documentaries ever to be created. Even if you don't care for Zombie's movie, the level of detail that was put into this FOUR HOUR bonus feature is astounding. I want to keep reliving the first time watching. Just a seriously fantastic compilation. Screw those nerdwriter1-esque video essays on Youtube, if you want to actually get into making movies and understanding the business for real, watch this now. It's like you're experiencing everything in real time.

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American Beauty

I guess this movie's like non-fiction now, right guys?

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The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Happy Death Day
Jigsaw
The Purge

Eh, for what it is, it's enjoyable enough. What really elevates this movie up though is it's brilliant concept, and how it actually has an effect on it's characters and resolution. There's a few points in the middle I didn't care for, and motivations that felt extremely unrealistic, but it's got it where it counts. I hear the sequels are better though, so I'm excited to watch those. This could use a bit of tweaking, but I'm going to be nice and give this a generous pass. Didn't hate it, don't think it's amazing, but I think it's a cool idea.

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Score: A Film Music Documentary
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