Add
Private Notes
This week: For the holidays, one medical center gave their patients the gift of massive anxiety! Also a PT Cruiser gets what it truly deserves and as usual a man impersonating law enforcement just has to make their persona a little too special ...
This week: "911 is not customer service" gets taken to a new level as a pair of burglars use it as a moving service. Also a porch pirate tries out a distinctive look and if you're going to do arson, try not to do it to yourself ...
This week: An AI Vtuber indulges in what could generously be called "revisionist history," why you shouldn't leave your kitchen appliances on a train and maybe before you call time of death you should probably check for a pulse ...
This week: Go home wine truck, you're drunk. Also the TSA gets all upset just because a man tries to bring an anti-tank rifle in his luggage and an object example of why you do not mess with archangels ...
This week: When this guy takes the bus, he REALLY takes the bus. Also a man curious what his friends will say when he's dead decides to find out, and an object lesson on mass, force, Jeeps and ATMs ...
This week: The Goonies, a dead fish, a yacht and the coast guard. You figure it out. Also this week a naked maniac in a hotel has us wondering where he got the plunger and the Lord Almighty tells the smartest man in the world to take a Ferrari for a swim ...
This week: Embezzlement, the Walmart way! Also a teacher's creative idea to get a day off might bring him federal charges and a man who stole monkeys and a leopard, and he'd friggin do it again ...
This week: A man opts to spend his golden years yelling the F-word at 911, using firearms to demand a McDonald's cookie and a foolproof way to keep people from stealing your stuff: arson!
This week: Are the biscuits at Popeye's really "Ram your SUV into the restaurant" good? Also attempting to storm a cockpit for a cocktail, and trying (and failing) to beat a train with an eighteen-wheeler ...
This week: The paradox of using a fire truck to start a fire. Also the perils of approaching the TSA with a sense of humor and why calling 911 isn't going to save you from bright lights in the sky ...
This week: Despite what you may have been told, boxing films don't require audience participation. Also the American relationship between crime and taxes, plus if you're using a Tesla as your getaway vehicle, maybe charge it before the crime ...
This week: Sometimes, love is getting the Walmart evacuated so the police don't arrest your boyfriend. Also this week, drunk driving your way onto a military base and if you're going to set up a sister city in another nation, make sure the city and nation even exist ...
This week: If you're going to go shoplifting, it's probably a good idea not to shoplift your getway vehicle as well. Also this week, a man explores the beautiful canals of Venice by way of a three-story belly flop and "volunteer firefighter" doesn't mean you can just jump on the truck (especially if you're naked) ...
This week: We learn why home insulation makes a terrible place to hide from police, that threatening a sheriff online will mean consequences (go figure) and finally we learn that scamming a high school teacher for thousands of dollars is as simple as namedropping Elon Musk ...
This week: Fully grown adult human beings compete with toddlers for candy and prizes, and it goes about as well as you'd expect. Also this week, mixing your job and your side hustle gets complicated when you're a first responder, and sometimes in life there's just gonna be a moose ...
This week: Prison, noun: a place they're going to send this idiot. Also this week, a man dumps his entire family's savings on the highway with predicable results and why googling "hitman jobs near me" might not be the best way to go about becoming an assassin ...
This week: We discover the definition of the word "rhinolith" and you're going to hate it. Also this week we explore the Kool Aid Man home rennovation technique and if you can dodge a truck, you can dodge a ball ...
This week: Calluna fills in this week where we have public indecency as a home remedy, a package sent to the wrong address ends up sending a man to jail and trying to seek vengence on grade schoolers is not a good look ...
This week: the Coronation of King Charles featured some surprise artwork, maybe don't hide the fact you dropped out of college by faking your own kidnapping and there's a million ways to say "I love you" but we found the worst one ...
This week: Why "ceiling crawl space" is almost always a misnomer, why your smuggling plan should focus on commiting to the bit and when stealing a vehicle maybe don't boost a five ton military truck ...
This week: When the judge says "stop driving," he means "immediately" and not "just after you crash into something else." Also this week, Spirit Airlines gets a lesson on what is and is not part of America and we discover enough fireworks and boredom can sent a toilet to the center of the earth ...
This week: A bear stole sixty cupcakes. That's as many as six tens, and that's terrible. Also a multimillionaire attempts to escape prison by way of yachts, castles and other criminals (which goes as well as you'd expect) and what happens when a very self-important government official drops his phone in a reservoir ...
This week: If you're already in trouble for stealing a police car, why not steal another one? Also we find out that banks have absolutely no sense of humor and when it comes to wreaking havoc in a museum, dumb, uh, finds a way ...
This week: No Uber? No problem! Just steal a backhoe! Also we discover the perils of trusting your GPS include being arrested in Canada and why ideally your attempt at burglary shouldn't include ramming into the building with a car ...
This week: A naked example of raw politics on display (and then some), a hot dog that came with a side of snow and when your ex has moved on, maybe try therapy before you resort to a bomb threat ...
This week: Funny how "never get out of the boat" works just as well for Disneyland as it does for Vietnam. Also, airpods are neat and all but are you really going to steal from the dead to afford them? And we also find out there's many ways to invoke the Lord's ire but this is probably the first time He's been directly involved in wage theft ...
This week: Remember how Han Solo dumped his cargo at the first sign of an Imperial patrol? Okay, it's like that but also with a nuclear reactor. Also why you can't escape the police by hopping aboard a vehicle that only goes in a long circle and how you can end up in an heap of trouble over one little balloon ...
This week: When the Trail of Tears meets a 4th of July parade you just know something stupid's afoot. Also if you've already lost your license that's a good sign the bus driver will do a better job than you, and "I didn't know it was that old" is probably not the best excuse for vandalizing the Roman Colosseum ...
This week: More kids defacing ancient historical monuments? Is this a Tiktok trend or something? Also: when robbing a bank, maybe put your manners on the back burner for a second and when you've already crashed your car twice maybe don't play chicken with an ambulance ...
This week: If you're going to use a brain scan to prove you're not competent to stand trial, don't just copy one from Google Images. Also this week, why stealing personalized cakes does 9/10s of the police's job for them and stealing a fire truck doesn't make you a volunteer firefighter ...
This week: Ever notice how a Lamborghini looks like a little wedge? One driver sure did! Also a Riker's inmate attempts escape using the same logic as an Elder Scrolls game and some people commit more felonies before dawn than you do all day ...
This week: Sometimes flights are held up by the weather. Sometimes it's bad scheduling. And sometimes it's a bear! Also this week, if they don't read you your rights are you really under arrest? (Yes.) And if you're going to go on a hundred mile per hour chase with the police, maybe don't do it in a Google Street View car ...
This week: If you're trying to haul away $300k of Magic The Gathering cards, maybe leave the merch promoting your own game at home. Also this week, being naked and flooding the emergency room probably isn't going to go over well with your insurance provider and a whole bunch of cars smashing into a whole lot of things for a whole lot of dumb reasons ...
This week: We've got a story about law enfocement stealing Pokemon cards from a big box mart; sounds like a rerun, but nope it happened again! Also we discover why live action Mario Kart is a lot less fun than it sounds (especially when the cops show up), and if you're standing naked next to a busted open pipe on the eleventh floor then yeah, you're probably the main suspect for who flooded the entire apartment building ...
This week: "You got your diesel in my regular" is not in fact two great tastes that go great together. Also this week, home product testing is fine but it's not for bulletproof vests and "finders keepers" does not apply to random bags of money you find on the sidewalk ...
This week: Spreading love is wonderful, but maybe your good tidings would be enhanced by wearing pants. Also a company that makes parts for 737s decides to wing it (ha) and maybe don't put your illegal street racing online. And under your own instagram account. With your fake license plates.
This week: A floating human hamster wheel takes the Coast Guard on a ride with a dark turn, a Clearwater Hyatt neglects to inform its guests of a hurricane evacuation and if you're going to ditch your ankle monitor have the decency to at least pay for the bolt cutters ...
This week: Disney has a whole new kind of "Country Bear Jamboree" on its hands, a man holds three people hostage over a Little Caesers Pizza (I know right) and a man tries to take on Walmart the only way he knows how: with a stolen excavator.
This week: You got to know when to hold them, know when to fold them, and learn when to fake an incurable illness! Also this week, an Oklahoma judge stages his own performance of "Dredd" in the dumbest way possible and if you ever drop your Apple Watch in an outhouse let it go because man, it's gone!
This week: Lots of Americans have multiple jobs, but few of them involve gunfire at a fast food joint! Also this week, how to properly lie about being attacked by a bear and when an arguement results in your husband clinging to the hood of you car you might be beyond couple's therapy ...
This week: A woman brings back some very unique organic souveniers from Africa, a man from Florida's Villages finds a new way to be an upstanding pillar of the community and when caught in the Walmart for stealing an old lady's credit card, you know what won't make it better? Pepper spray!
This week: Just because you're too dim to understand how grand theft auto works doesn't mean you can't be arrested for it. Also a pilot with a penchant for dropping tomatoes on one woman's house and if you ever wondered if there was something worse than graverobbing, wonder no more ...
This week: Find out what happens when you're not home and a demolition company gets the address wrong. Also this week: road rage is a little less easy to explain away if you do it while running three simultaneous cameras, and one man decided to turn a teddy bear into a whole slew of felonies ...
This week: Have you ever wanted to be in a heist? Well, we found one you'd probably refuse! Also this week we see what happens when you won't allow your charter boat to be inspected (hint: bad things) and if you ever find yourself uttering the phrase "you can't take me to jail" you're about to discover that you're usually very wrong ...
It's time one again for the best of the worst of this year's "sexy" costumes! Oh good lord why is this happening!
This week: We find out how to get a head at the thrift shop! Also this week we find out what happens when you don't represent yourself but your lawyer still ends up with a fool for a client, and someone finally asks the question: "Why was this guy naked?"
This week: If you're gonna steal cars in Washington DC, make sure you're not boosting an unmarked Secret Service vehicle. Also this week, why you shouldn't solve neighborhood problems with mortar shells and one of the weirdest promotions ever: "Glocks and Grins!"
This week: How can you get locked up in a jail that isn't even a working jail anymore? We'll find out! Also this week, the most expensive and dangerous tool kit in the world and the unearned confidence it takes to climb a 13,000 foot ridge in a snowstorm wearing with barely a hoodie ...
This week: If your answer to what blocks x-rays is "bread," maybe don't go into smuggling. Also this week, maybe don't fall asleep with the turkey frier running the kitchen and getting naked at "It's a Small World" sets yourself up for all of the jokes ...
This week: The Gävle Goat is back, and now our watch begins! Also this week, an escaped kangaroo with a real dislike of authority, a brand new meaning for Pringles "Once you pop, you can't stop," and if you're going to quit your job as a prison van driver, maybe wait until you've dropped off the prisoners first ...
This week: Canadians appear to be slowly replacing hockey with Pokémon, but keeping the fistfights. Also this week we discover that "USB" isn't supposed to be THAT universal, and name something you shouldn't take in an MRI machine. Here's a hint: BANG!
This week: Maybe 4/20 isn't the best day to rob a bank. Also this week, a man's customer service frustrations don't take him to his destination but do take him to a federal felony, and you probably shouldn't decide to drive yourself to the airport right in the middle of your Uber ride ...
This week: Does it count as kidnapping if it's our Lord and Savior? Also a Bass Pro Shop faces an existential crisis when a customer goes fishing inside the store and the obvious solution when you're in trouble for stealing a pack of smokes is to burn your own house down ...
